Showing posts sorted by relevance for query last graduate. Sort by date Show all posts
Showing posts sorted by relevance for query last graduate. Sort by date Show all posts

Wednesday, November 16, 2022

The Last Graduate (The Scholomance #2) by Naomi Novik

 A Deadly Education

I really liked A Deadly Education, so I optimistically picked up the second in the trilogy, The Last Graduate, hoping it would end a somewhat blah period of reading for me. I'm sort of at the point where I'm wondering if there are books I like out there anymore. Do I like reading? Do I just do it because it's a habit?  This is what happens when I get in a book rut.  Anyway. I dove in.

El is trying to finish her last year at the Scholomance. She's made some allies and she's determined that they'll all make it out alive. But then she realizes that the school actually wants to help its students, not create the death trap that it currently is, and all the rules change.

This book. It was fine, I guess? I mean, I'm struggling over here to not be mean. What was so exciting in the first book in terms of a new take on a magical school (it's evil!), El being an independent sort, deadly creatures wandering around at every moment ready to kill just became a bit humdrum and repetitive in this book. Even the whole "we need to get through graduation" thing was exactly the same. El being a bit of a social outcast was the same.

I did like that she has a great mouse pet, though so there was that.

Maybe it's me? This book rut is my fault, not the fault of the books I'm reading? I don't know. I just ordered a slew of non-fiction books in the hopes that perhaps I just need to change my reading strategy and I'll get over it. Let's see. 

2.5/5 stars

Lines of note:

"It's not a complex problem to appear nice to people! You identify the most popular targets in each of your classes, learn what they value about themselves, and give them a minimum of three relevant compliments each week. So long as they think you are agreeable, others will follow their lead." (page 276)

Is this right? Are people this transactional? I am so confused by human behavior. 

"There's no such thing as normal people," I said, a desperate flailing. "There's just people, and some of them are miserable, and some of them are happy, and you've the same right to be happy as any of them - no more and no less." (page 350)

Hm. Food for thought.

Word I looked up:

beldame (page 28) - a malicious and ugly woman, especially old; a witch

Friday, June 07, 2024

Five Plus One for Friday, Edition #6

1) Update #1: Valet stand - Purchased and set up in his office. 


2) Update #2: Dining room table - I washed my heated vest doing laundry last weekend and put it away for the season, I washed all my merch from my alma mater and am actively wearing it these days, I recycled the paperwork about the class action lawsuit, we bought honey from the honey people at the Market last weekend, I wrote the review for the book, I ordered makeup, I sent that greeting card, and I didn't use the REI coupon because they didn't have good options for cross-trainers.

I still have four thank you cards to write, I have a new book sitting there to write a review about, and I need to reorder a prescription, but those are the only to-do items left on the table.

3) What does Adriene of Yoga with Adriene mean when she says "hug the low ribs in"? Like...my ribs are bones? And I have no control over them? 

4) At work, I sometimes leave myself reminders of things that need to be done with little notes on my calendar like follow-up with Joe Smith (#7788990) and I'll write a description "Did Joe graduate? If yes, call and congratulate him. If not, follow up and get him on track to graduate this summer." But this takes all of five minutes and it takes up an entire fifteen minute slot on my calendar. How do you deal with these follow-ups that are months out - I met with Joe in January or February for the first time so I need a reminder and I need a description of the situation?

5) Update #3: The dentist saga continues - I have bad gums. And I see my periodontist every six months for a cleaning and my regular dentist every six months for a cleaning, meaning my teeth are cleaned every three months. And for a decade I had an awesome family dentist and he retired and was replaced by a new guy who acts like my teeth are about to fall out of my head at any second. And I was powering through with him because for the last few times I'd been, the hygienist was lovely.

But last week I went and there was a new hygienist who tried to sell me on 1) a waterpik and 2) whitening mouthwash. I have been told REPEATEDLY by my periodontist that waterpiks are terrible for someone with my condition and whitening products just end up increasing my already sensitive gums/tooth bones. And when I said "no, thank you," she kept on and on and I was in tears when I left. I called my SIL the dentist who told me to just ignore everything the hygienist said, which made me feel better, but also made me feel worse.

So, you're probably thinking, just change dentists. As I found myself making another appointment for December, I wondered about this, too.

Here's the deal. We have sort of crappy dental insurance (it's the one all state employees get) and only four dentists in our area (my town and the town where our university is) accept this insurance. One is my dentist; one is a dentist with incredibly polarizing reviews (LOVE or HATE and nothing in between and I don't know who to trust); one is a dentist that is the merging of two dental practices that had great reviews when they were solo, but there's no way to speak to a human when you call the number; and the last is a dentist that has assured my husband who switched there that they are going to stop taking the insurance in the next cycle. 

I guess I'll continue with this dentist. 

6) June is first-year orientation month at our university. I run a session for folks coming into our college and as they are coming in, I play music*. I try to play upbeat music. Here's a sampling of songs on the playlist:

    "Flowers" by Miley Cyrus
    "Shake it Off" by Taylor Swift
    "Eye of the Tiger" by Survivor
    "It's My Life" by Bon Jovi
    "Hey There Delilah" by Plain White T's
    "Don't Stop Believin'" by Journey
    "Daydream Believer" by The Monkees
    "Brown Eyed Girl" by Van Morrison
    "Summer of '69" by Bryan Adams
    "Believe" by Cher
    "Wannabe" by Spice Girls
    "Single Ladies" by BeyoncĂ©
    "Mama Said" by The Shirelles
    "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" by Cyndi Lauper
    "My Girl" by The Temptations
    "Dancing Queen" by ABBA
    "Another Saturday Night" by Sam Cooke
    "I Can't Help Myself" by Four Tops
    "Soul Man" by Sam & Dave
    "I Wanna Hold Your Hand" by The Beatles
    "Call Me Maybe" by Carly Rae Jepsen

*I may have gotten my hand slapped for playing the music too loud on the first day of orientation. Whoops. I also took the students through the wrong door to the computer lab that day and got a stern talking to from the direction of orientation. Sorry, everyone!

This is all great, but many of you are noticing that many of these songs are...fifty or sixty years old? What should I be adding to this list? Like...what are young folks listening to that pumps them up? I don't want anything insanely provocative or with a lot of cursing, but mild innuendo and a hell or a damn is fine.  Any thoughts?

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Thoughts on "knit your low ribs in"? What do you use for to-dos at work? What songs to the young people listen to when they want to get pumped up?

Saturday, November 19, 2022

1.19 Library - Shelved Books

Bestest Friend and I are doing a blog project. Every day we will write a blog post on a pre-determined theme chosen by a random noun generator. The theme for the nineteenth day of the month is "Library." I've decided I'm going to just tell you what are on my library book shelves each month.

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As you know, I'm in the middle of a bad reading rut. I'm struggling with what to read next because I think I'm feeling mean and nasty about books right now, so the next book I read has to be brilliant enough to combat that feeling or just bad enough that I feel okay about maintaining that feeling.  Here's what I have.

Paper books I have checked out:
The Ten Thousand Doors of January by Alix E. Harrow (fantasy, currently reading)
The Glorious Heresies by Lisa McInerney (contemporary fiction, DNFed, needs to be returned)
The Evening and the Morning (Kingsbridge #0) by Ken Follett (historical fiction)
The Last Graduate (The Scholomance #2) by Naomi Novik (YA fantasy, did not love, needs to be returned)
The Golden Enclaves (The Scholomance #3) by Naomi Novik (YA fantasy)
Home Fire by Kamila Shamsie (contemporary fiction)
The Last Herald Mage by Mercedes Lackey (fantasy)




Ebooks I have checked out:
Charmed Life (Chrestomanci #1) by Diana Wynne Jones (YA fantasy, probably will be a DNF)
Beneath the Sugar Sky (Wayward Children #3) by Seanan McGuire (YA fantasy)

Audiobook I have checked out:
The Soulmate Equation by Christina Lauren (romance, only have it for two more days and haven't started it, so will probably be returned without me ever starting it)

Board game I have check out:
Codewords (we have a Harry Potter version we both like very much, but before I put the original on my holiday list, I thought I'd check it out to see if we like the OG version as much)

Books I have on hold:
The Kissing Bug: A True Story of a Family, an Insect, and a Nation's Neglect of a Deadly Disease by Daisy Hernandez (ready to be picked up at the public library)
The Ink Black Heart (Cormoran Strike #6) by Robert Galbraith (in the shipping process to the public library)
Because Internet: Understanding the New Rules of Language by Gretchen McCulloch (ready to be picked up at the university library),
The Round House by Louise Erdrich (pending at the public library)
The Royal We by Heather Cocks and Jessica Morgan (pending at the public library)
A Wolf Called Wander by Roseanne Parry, illustrated by Monica Armino (pending at the public library)

Daughter of the Forest (Sevenwaters #1) by Juliet Marillier (ebook hold; 7 out of 7)
The Empress of Salt and Fortune (The Singing Hills Cycle #1) by Nghi Vo (ebook hold; 6 out of 7)
Black Sun (Between Earth and Sky #1) by Rebecca Roanhouse (ebook hold; 16 out of 18)
American Royalty by Tracey Livesay (ebook hold; 17 out of 18)
Funny You Should Ask by Elissa Sussman (ebook hold; 16 of 171)
Nora Goes Off Script by Annabel Monaghan (ebook hold; 18 of 247)
Hello Stranger (The Ravenels #4) by Lisa Kleypas (ebook hold; 9 of 14) - note to self: why am I still reading this series?
Crying in H Mart by Michelle Zauner (ebook hold; 14 of 351)
Kushiel's Dart (Phedre's Trilogy #1) by Jacqueline Carey (ebook hold; 4 of 19)
The Friend by Sigrid Nunez (ebook hold; 12 of 12)

Have you read any of these books?  Please tell me that my reading rut will end soon.

Wednesday, November 30, 2022

The Golden Enclaves (The Scholomance #3) by Naomi Novik

The Golden Enclaves is the third book in Naomi Novik's Scholomance trilogy. I liked the first book a lot (4.5 stars!), but the second book left me feeling less than impressed (2.5 stars). What is this book going to bring us?

In the first book, we meet El at an evil magical school where she meets some fellow misfits. In the second book, she and her allies manage to defeat the school, but at a huge price for El. In this book, El is wallowing in grief at home when she suddenly becomes aware that enclaves around the world are falling and people are dying. Off she goes to save the day.

There were some bright spots in this book. I liked seeing how wizards live outside of the school. I like spending more time with El's mom. I really like El's pet mouse.

But boy was the rest of this boring. I just kept falling asleep after reading ten pages. So much teenage angst, which is appropriate for the YAness of it all, but not appropriate for me, a grown ass woman. (There was also a point where a character is mourning the death of someone she had just said "I love you" to, but immediately jumps into bed with another character. Fine. I get rebound sex. Then, it turn out the original someone isn't dead, so she sleeps with him, as you would. BUT THEN she sleeps with the rebound sex person AGAIN. Not a mention about protection from STIs, either.)

Plus, the ending was unsatisfying. I don't want to spoil anything, but I don't feel like anyone is happy and there's legitimately no confrontation between El and the Evil Villain of the thing. *heavy sigh* The first book in this series was very promising.

2/5 stars

Wednesday, August 21, 2024

I Got a Gold Medal, Too!

I'm trying not be too enigmatic because this is my very own blog, but I also don't want to be too transparent about what's going on. Hard things are happening right now. There is STUFF. And maybe someday I'll write about that stuff, but you know what, I'm going to temporarily forget about all that and take some time to write about some wins.

1) I was on a team at my job where did activity tracking for a couple of months and we won! Yay! (I will omit how this was terrible for my mental health and led to some severe anxiety where I was all "I'm letting my team down" on a day when I tracked zero activities because I was in the hospital with a loved one. Also, someday soon I'm going to write a long post about how much my own health has suffered in the last six months.) Here's to the win!

TJC came up with the name and logo idea and I shared it with my team and one of my teammates used an AI tool to create the logo. 

Our prizes. Poor HR. There's just no money anymore. 

2) Some other small victories at work:

a) Someone from a weird unit at work that I don't normally work with messaged me to ask if I could talk to them. It turns out they have a student employee who is really struggling and I met with the student, helped them change majors, and gave them a pep talk about how they are important and can do hard things and ALSO that they need to be their own advocate for their education. 

Email from the student: 

Thank you so much for all the help! I just registered for courses, and I am very excited to continue!

b) Do you remember the student I was helping to retake a course at an accelerated pace and she cried and I cried and it was all very professional in my office? Summer grades have been posted, I followed up with the student, she got an A, I called to congratulate her, she cried, I cried, it was all professional in my office all over again

c) A student was returning after being gone for a couple of years (COVID screwed up a lot of people's plans) and her advising audit was reading that she needed four classes, but I remembered that her major had changed the curriculum a couple of years ago and had the audit backdated to when she was first admitted, not readmitted, and then she only had to take TWO classes and she's going to graduate in December!  That's big for her.

3) Zelda's brown ball is back in action! This ball has been her favorite toy since she was a literal kitten. I wrote that post I just linked to in 2014 (try not to think about how bizarre it is that 2014 was TEN YEARS AGO).  When we got Hannah, we left the scratching post up, but took away the ball because we were worried Hannah would destroy it. I put the ball up when we were gone overnight last weekend and Zelda played and played with it. 

I then forgot to put it up and Hannah sniffed it briefly, but left it alone. And I have been putting it back on the scratching post every time I find it and Zelda has been pulling it off and running around with it. Dr. BB reported that when Hannah and I were on a walk last night, she was walking around the house with the brown ball in her mouth, meowing around it. 

Brown ball is BACK, BABY. I'm excited that Hannah is a good dog and leaves the cat's toys alone and I'm glad Zelda gets to play with something since I'm a jerk who never plays with her.  


What's a recent win in your life?

Tuesday, December 06, 2022

November 2022 Book List

This month started off dire. Lots of bad books. It mostly turned around by the end of the month, but things were dire for a hot minute.


11/1: Sunshine by Robin McKinley (library audiobook, 2003) - Such good worldbuilding for a one and done novel. If only that worldbuilding didn't threaten to put you to sleep all the time. 3/5 stars

11/3: Writers & Lovers by Lily King (library, 2020) - Book club book that made me want to initiate physical violence against someone. 2.5/5 stars

11/5: Carrie Soto is Back by Taylor Jenkins Reid (library, 2022) - A miss for me. Too much tennis, too little empathy from the main character. 2.5/5 stars

11/6: The Trespasser (Dublin Murder Squad #6) by Tana French (library ebook, 2016) - I did not care for this book. 2/5 stars

11/7: Storm Echo (Psy-Changeling Trinity #6) by Nalini Singh (library ebook, 2022) - Oh, a book that broke my bad book streak. A glorious return to form for this series, which is more than 20 books deep at this point. Sweet romance, great mystery in-world. 4/5 stars

11/7: A Darker Shade of Magic (Shades of Magic #1) by V.E. Schwab (library audiobook read by Steven Crossley, 2015) - Lackluster.  I will not be reading more of this. 2.5/5 stars

11/10: Bombshell (Hell's Belles #1) by Sarah MacLean (library ebook, 2021)  - This is purportedly the first in a series, but it's clearly in the middle of other series and I was absolutely confused and befuddled. I can see why folks like this take on historical fiction with its independent female lead and dreamy male hero, but it fell very flat for me. 2/5 stars

11/10: The Last Graduate (The Scholomance #2) by Naomi Novik (library, 2021) - I'm over reading. I'll never read again. Just seemed like a repeat of the first book. 2.5/5 stars

11/12: A Prayer for the Crown-Shy (Monk and Robot #2) by Becky Chambers (library ebook, 2022) - I think I hate reading. I hate books. 2.5/5 stars

11/15: Beneath the Sugar Sky (Wayward Children #3) by Seanan McGuire (library ebook, 2019) - Not the best entry in the Wayward Children series. 3/5 stars

11/16: The Ten Thousand Doors of January by Alix E. Harrow (library, 2019) - Pretty good book. I liked the dog character a lot. 4/5 stars

11/19: Life Below Stairs: True Lives of Edwardian Servants by Alison Maloney (library ebook, 2011) - I wanted this to be like How To Be Victorian, but instead it was superficial and might have been better as a magazine article. 3/5 stars

11/21: The 57 Bus: A True Story of Two Teenagers and the Crime That Changed Their Lives by Dashka Slater (library ebook, 2017) - Heartbreaking, but somehow hopeful. 4.5/5 stars

11/23: The Ink Black Heart (Cormoran Strike #6) by Robert Galbraith (library, 2022)  - You know what, I really enjoyed this book.  4.5/5 stars

11/27: The Golden Enclaves (The Scholomance #3) by Naomi Novik (library 2022) - This was not good at all. I read it because it was the third book in a trilogy, but I did not enjoy it at all. 2/5 stars

11/28: Home Fire by Kamila Shamsie (library, 2017) - An interesting meditation on immigration and assimilation in the modern world. Not an easy read, though. 4/5 stars

11/30: The Royal We (Royal We #1) by Heather Cocks & Jessica Morgan (library, 2015) - Such a good book about a couple that's never going to make it. 4.5/5 stars

Total: 17 books
Average star rating: 3.12/5 stars

Did not finish:

Glorious Heresies by Lisa McInerney - Drugs, violence, gratuitous teenage sex, and murder. And it was only page 82 when I stopped. Not the book for me. DNF at 21.3%.

Charmed Life (Chrestomanci #1) by Diana Wynee Jones - Beloved YA fantasy series that I couldn't connect with because of adults who don't tell children important things and children being brats. DNF at 21%.

Wednesday, December 09, 2015

Five Personalized Ornaments

We have one box that holds all our Christmas things. One box. Well, the tree is another box, but any decorations, including lights and ornaments, that I want to own must fit inside the box.  So every year I spend too many hours to count trying to decide on the perfect ornament for us in a particular year. Here are some contenders for this year's ornament.

1. Snow Owls from Pee Wee's Clay House ($15 + $3.50 s&h) - I think these little guys are adorable and they probably would have been my first choice except I didn't get on the ordering of the ornaments until last weekend and the deadline for a Christmas shipment has already passed. 

2. Personalized Wire Ornaments ($16 + $6 s&h from Deihign Design) - I always kind of feel bad that Zelda is left off our ornament since she's a very important part of our family, so I think it would be nice to get a couple ornament and a cat ornament with matching wire colors. As a matter of fact, I'm almost 100% sure that this is what I'm going to be doing this year. So I'll technically get two ornaments, but it's a matching set!

3. Personalized Love Bird Ornament ($15.50 + $2.50 s&h from My Little Chick) - I am not a huge fan of hearts to represent love, so I love that this ornament with love birds doesn't have the birds chirping out hearts. It's simple, elegant, and beautiful. It may still be on my wish list next year!

4. 50 States Ornament ($13 + $3 s&h from Blocks, Etc.) - This is a perfect gift, especially for a recent college graduate who is working his or her first job and might be a tiny bit nostalgic for that time of life when you got a month off during the holidays!

5. Scrabble Tile Ornament ($9 + $4 s&h from My Bluebird Corner) - You know that the nerd in you really wants one of these hanging on your tree.  I didn't go with this because I'd have to get three of them (one for Dr. BB, me, and Zelda) and I'm already sort of breaking the rules with the three, so there you have it. When I decided to not change my last name when I got married, I knew that the shared last names gifts would be off the list!

BONUS
6. Custom House Portrait Ornament ($48 + $6.50 s&h from Magic Markings Art) - Normally I wouldn't recommend an ornament that costs this much money. But if you have someone on your list who is particularly hard to shop for, but loves his or her house, this might be a good solution.  It's lovely, it's personal, and it will be meaningful for years to come!

Wednesday, April 23, 2025

Love Thyself

It was a combination of things that led to this post. Nicole recently had a post called Tell Me Something Beautiful About You that was focused on our physical appearance. We all think our friends our beautiful, but when we look in the mirror, many of us are critical to our own selves in a way that would be considered downright cruel if we voiced it about someone else, so the focus is on self-love in what I see as a radical way through self-acceptance and appreciation.

I teach a Careers class - a one-credit class that is mostly taken by people who need one credit to graduate, but also has some underclasspeople in it. I focus on personality exploration (Stephany would appreciate that part), career exploration based on personality and interest, resume and cover letter writing, networking, and interviewing. Most students like it, although I had a guy last semester who complained nonstop throughout the semester and said it was busywork. *shrug*  This semester I did something new and had them sign up for mock interviews with me via our Zoom equivalent. Historically I haven't done this because the interview module aligns with advising season, but this semester I just said, oh well, and have had wall to wall student meetings in April.

In this mock interview, I ask them a couple of softball questions, but then I throw in some tough ones to see what they do and how they react when they don't have an answered prepared. One of the questions is "what is your greatest professional achievement?" and the other is "what makes you unique?" and I realized in my last interview that I had no idea how I would answer those questions if presented to me. 

In the spirit of self-exploration, love, and radical self-acceptance, here are my answers to some hard questions. I'll give three answers for each of them.

This has nothing to do with this post, but I took this photo when Dr. BB and I were at the Natural History Museum. I suspect that adorable creature has no self-esteem issues.

What is beautiful about you?

1) The answer I gave on Nicole's post is: I love my ginormous nose. It comes from both sides of the family and it ties to me to all my beloved aunts, uncles, and cousins. In profile, I look just like my Uncle Kevin who is a great man among great men and it makes me giggle when I see a profile shot of myself and think “I am a miniature of a 60something man.”

2) My boobs. They're large and sometimes get in the way when I'm doing yoga, but they're shapely and my husband digs them.

3) My butt. It turns out that I basically do all my lower body through my glutes and that means I have tight ass. I like it. 

What are the best decisions you've made in your life?

1) Marrying Dr. BB. Honestly, I can't imagine another man who would be as perfect for me as he is.

2) Leaving my hometown. I was at an introductory doctor's appointment a year or so back and my doctor was going over my family health history. She started talking to me and she asked, "so how come you don't smoke or do drugs, exercise, eat healthy, and don't have these conditions?" "I left." 

3) Keeping my friendships even through the hard times. I have good friends from high school and college who I am still in regular contact and I never regret the time I've invested in those friendships. 

What is your greatest professional achievement?

1) Leaving my volunteer position with a transition plan in place and without burning any bridges. I learned a lot of skills at that job and did a lot of things I would never have done otherwise, but I'm glad that part of my life is behind me.

2) I have recently started seeing results to some of my outreach at work. Last week I had two (TWO!) students call me because I had reached out to them in the past and ask for help right now. I know that seems trivial, but it's not. It shows that our model of forming relationships and reaching out to students who seem to be struggling is working and that I'm earning students' trust. Likewise, I had a faculty member call me yesterday and she didn't even say her name, she just started the phone call with "help" and I was able to get her what she needed within five minutes. It's working.

3) Friends, this is silly, but I was valedictorian of my high school class and a National Merit Finalist. I have feelings about some of this, but I also worked really hard for both of those things. 

What makes you unique?

1) My obsession with hats.

2) My commitment to snail mail.

3) My knowledge of the complete oeuvres of Garth Brooks, Skid Row, and Bon Jovi. 

What do you like about yourself?

1) If I say I'm going to do something, I do it. 

2) I always dance as if no one is watching.

3) I try to think of others first. 

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What do you like about yourself? Do you find these questions hard to answer?

Monday, November 07, 2022

2022 NaBloPoMo Q&A, Part I

If you're new here, I did a 20 Questions post last year that discusses some basics of who I am, so that's a good place to start if you don't know much about me. Last month I asked you for questions and now I'm here to answer them. I got a lot of questions, so I'm breaking this up into two parts. This is part I. 

Elisabeth asked:

1) Have you always had pets?

I definitely grew up in a household with pets. We moved around a lot when I was little, but we settled down in Michigan when I was seven and pretty immediately got a cat to help control the rodent population. She was a mean cat, Penny was, and I still have a scar on my right wrist from her claws. We had a selection of dogs and cats as I grew up and by the time I left for college, we'd settled in that two cats and three dogs were a good number for our family. We had Loudmouth and Heinz for cats and Dusty, Midnight, and Gizmo for dogs when I left for college.

In college and grad school, I pet sat a fair amount and occasionally had roommates with pets, but didn't have furry pets of my own. I did have a succession of fish, frogs, and lizards, though. When I met Dr. BB, I made sure the he knew that having pets was a priority for me. For a few months after we were first married, we did a long-term catsitting gig when we had some friends who were overseas for a bit and Dr. BB fell in love with that cat (oh, Dae) and I knew that I had sold him that pets were important.

Right before we moved out of Minneapolis in 2011, I was visiting some friends in Michigan who had rescued a litter of teeny tiny barn kittens. Zelda was the last kitten available and my friends who had three rambunctious children were making noises about taking her; I scooped her up and said I'd take her home because I was worried for her life in that household (they are all three lovely young adults now, but eleven years ago was a different story). Note that I agreed to take the cat before consulting my husband, but let's not dwell on that. She was little and cute and became Zelda the Cat.

We had Zelda for years and years before we bought a house. Part of me agreeing to buy the house was that we could get a dog. What really happened was that we moved into our house, I went to visit my mom and sister, and my sister's dog bit me. That put off our dog search for a year. We adopted Hannah the Dog in the summer of 2019.

Since Dr. BB grew up in a home without pets, I think he still sort of thinks it's weird that he lives with a cat and a dog now. I, however feel like a house is not a home without a pet. I will make some allowances for people with allergies, but even then I think you should have a fish or a bird or something.

2) Do the people that you send snail mail to every month also respond via the postal service?

Ha. Rarely. I love it when people DO mail me back, but I mostly send mail so my loved ones know I'm thinking about them, even if they are far away. I have no expectation of reciprocation. 

Anne asked:

3) Who are the people you write to every month? 

The three people I write to are my mom, Aunt Debbie, and Uncle Kevin. I used to write my Grandmother and Aunt Jean, too, before they passed away. 

Back to questions from Elizabeth:

4) How/where do you store scarves?

I store them in my downstairs clothes closet. I have two special scarf hanger/organizer things and one regular hanger that I use. They actually don't take up much room at all and they're quick at hand whenever I need them.


5) What's your ideal vacation?

For a variety of reasons having to do with food and control, I'm going to leave my husband at home. I'm renting an Air BnB with my best friend and hiring a caterer to handle all the cooking for our vacation. We mostly sit around around a pool or at a beach with books in our hands. Maybe, just maybe, once a day we'll leave for some sort of activity like a hike, museum visit, or shopping at an adorable downtown area, but let's not get carried away with things we need to plan. And we read books, nap, and eat delicious food we haven't prepared. That's basically the ideal version for me.

6) What's your favorite meal - start to finish?

Interesting and hard question. I am going to follow the format of the Off Menu podcast. 

Water: Grapefruit Perrier
Bread: Seedy white bread with lots of room temp butter
Appetizer: Caesar salad with extra croutons
Main dish: Lasagna
Drink: Diet Coke (this is a dream - I don't have caffeine any more, but this would not be a problem in my dream world)
Dessert: Tiramisu. I wouldn't be mad if it came with a scoop of vanilla or coffee ice cream on the side
After-dinner: A lovely cheese plate and coffee with cream

Interestingly enough, as I read through this, it seems like you could buy me some Perrier and take me the Olive Garden and I will be your girl.

7) What's your dream job (like dream-dream; money is no object and you can snap your fingers and acquire all the necessary skills immediately)?

I always wanted to be a translator at someplace like the United Nations or the International Court of Justice. I like the idea of being involved in international politics and the fight for human rights. Unfortunately, I am just not as good at languages as I'd like to be. I am too literal and don't understand nuances of languages, which would make me a terrible translator in real life.

Nicole asked:

8) What is your degree in?

My undergraduate and graduate degrees are in political science. I have a heavy emphasis on math and stats, though, with an undergrad minor in math and an emphasis on research methods in grad school. I'm your all around basic liberal arts bitch.

Birchwood Pie asked:

9) Why did you choose the field you chose to study?

I choose political science because government is the heart of everything we do. There's not a choice you make that the government doesn't have a hand in and I like to think about structures and institutions of power and how they work. I also like that this it focuses on something really complex and challenging like figuring out human behavior (how will voters vote? judges decide? governments act? non-governmental entities interfere?), but also allows me to flex my math chops. It's a field that takes the best from math/stats, psychology, economics, and law and mixes it up into the most delicious stew.

(Also, anyone who thinks people in the STEM field have the hardest jobs? You are wrong. It's just plugging numbers into equations. Gravity is predictable. Drag is predictable. People are not. The social sciences are the most complex because people are unpredictable.)

10) How did you meet Dr. BB?

We met in grad school. He was a cohort ahead of me. He was a better grad student than me and had a crush on my roommate. Some of the early entries on this web log are from early dates with him. (Don't read those. The me of 2005 apparently didn't know what a paragraph break was.) We actually study completely different subfields and we don't really understand what the other does.

I remember Dr. BB getting a new cell phone and refusing to give me or my roommate his number because he only had limited minutes. Do you remember those days? He claims that this is clearly untrue because he would never deny a pretty woman his number. I guess I eventually did get his number.  

Anne asked:

11) How did you end up where you live?

We moved to Wisconsin because my husband got a tenure track job at a small state school here. This was quite a coup since political theory jobs are few and far between, so we moved to the town where the school is. We lived there in an apartment until Dr. BB actually got tenure and then we bought a house in the next town over. The advantages to where we live now are that this town has an actual grocery store (two of them, as a matter of fact!) and the houses next door are a million times less likely to be turned into student housing. We also don't literally live next door to my husband's students.

12) What's your favorite childhood memory?

I used to spend summers with my Uncle Lenny and Aunt Debbie. I wrote about it a tiny bit before when Uncle Lenny died, but let me expand on an all-time legendary story. Lenny and Debbie didn't have children of their own, but every summer they'd take some of their tween/teen nieces and nephews for weeks on end. We'd go camping, traveling, and just generally goof off with them. At one point, there was a big group of us and we decided to go floating/canoeing down a river. It was me, my sister, my cousins Rachel, Jessica, Greg, and Melanie, and my Aunt Debbie's nephew on her side, Johnny.  We had a blast. We got sunburned, overturned the canoe, and Melanie and Johnny may have done some hanky panky under the cover of the river water.

When we got back to the car, it turned out that Uncle Lenny had somehow LOST THE CAR KEYS in the river. Apparently, this happens with some regularity. Ha!  We were able to break into the car, so we could change into somewhat dry clothes, but we didn't really have anyplace to stay and so all nine of us ended up spending the night in someone's random backyard shed (maybe? my memory is fuzzy). We basically relied on the kindness of strangers to get us food. Aunt Debbie's dad drove a spare set of car keys to us the next day. He got a speeding ticket. It was calamity after calamity. It's a great, classic family story.

Stay tuned for more questions tomorrow! In the meantime, please regale me with stories from your childhood.

Friday, July 14, 2023

9.14 Control - Seven Existential Questions

Bestest Friend and I are doing a blog project. Each day we will write a post on a pre-determined theme chosen by a random noun generator. The theme for the fourteenth day of the month is "Control."

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Before we get to the meat of this post, this is a reminder to my fellow ATGIB book club members! If you have not already sent me an email with a photo of your book, please do so! The deadline is Sunday 7/16 at 4:00pm (CST CDT - I stand corrected) to see your photo in the collage. If you send me a photo of this deadline, I can add it to later weeks. dominique100 at hotmail dot com

(Note: I just spent three minutes of my life trying to figure out if it was CDT or CST to tell you the deadline and I'm still not sure I got it right. I mean Central (US) time zone, but you figured that out, right? Even if I got it wrong?)

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A Grace Full Life recently wrote a post in which she answered seven existential questions (that are based on something, something, something - there are details, but I couldn't be bothered to understand the flow chart after Minnie Driver and Proust came up in the same sentence).  I also couldn't be bothered to come up with an original post idea today, so here we are. 4

Ally Bean answered these questions, too!

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1. When and where were you happiest?

My junior year of college. I had my shit together, graduation still seemed far off, I had friends, and I still had the self-confidence of someone who had not yet been to graduate school.

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What quality do you like the least about yourself?

My internal monologue is exhausting. I'm mean and snarky and as much as I try and work on increasing my positive and happy thoughts, I struggle. 

My SIL told me once that she realized in high school when she was at some awards ceremony for upperclassmen that she could potentially win all the superlative awards (you know - most popular, most friendly, most athletic, most likely to succeed, most likely to end up in jail, etc.) except for most kind and she vowed to work on that. And she succeeded. She's very positive and she has told me that every once in a while she slips back into snarky mode, but just a few days of focusing on the positive and she can turn things around.

Well, I've been working on this for years and as much as I try to control the direction of my thoughts, the snark is still my default, unfortunately. I want to be a nice, kind person, but I fear I am not. 

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What relationship - real or fictional - defines love for you?

Part of the reason that the previous answer is so detailed is because have you seen the way Hannah looks at me? She honestly thinks I'm a good person and I want to be as good a person as she thinks I am. Hannah's love for me is the epitome of true love. How did I get through most of my adult life without a dog?


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What would be your last meal?

Oh, who cares? I'd eat lasagna and ice cream and drink Diet Coke like it was going out of style. 

But, Hannah! Hannah, who can only eat gross dog food, sweet potatoes, pumpkin, chicken, eggs, and marshmallows (and she doesn't even like the marshmallows!).  For Hannah, I'd give her all the things for her last meal because it won't matter anymore. A steak, chocolate ice cream, and a fucking bone.  Poor Hannah.

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What person, place, or experience has most altered your life?

I have so many answers for this.

1. College was absolutely life-altering. I learned how to be independent, make my own choices, and deal with the consequences of those choices. Going away to college was the right choice for me.

2. Moving to Minneapolis changed the trajectory of my entire life. I met my husband there and met so many awesome people who are still my friends. 

3. Being with my mother-in-law when she was dying and being in the room with her when she died changed everything about how I see end of life care and mortality.

So, it's hard to say what the one and only one answer is here. My husband is the person who has most altered my life. Minneapolis is probably the place that altered it the most. My MIL's death is the experience that most altered it. But I don't know which one is the most of the most.

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What question would you most like answered?

What does it take to truly be happy?

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What in your life has grown out of personal disaster?

More than a decade ago, I broke my leg pretty badly. We'd been married a few years at this point, but it felt like we were still in the newlywed stage. We'd just moved to a small town and I hated it, but was trying to bloom where I was planted. I'd found some dribs and drabs of work, was volunteering, and oh, yeah, we had that tiny baby kitten!  

But me breaking my leg was an absolute disaster. I couldn't work. Dr. BB was struggling to stay afloat in his first teaching job. We had absolutely no friends or support system in that town. It was a mess.

Let me just tell you, though, that this experience really brought me and Dr. BB together as a solid couple. Before that time, we'd sort of still been living like people who were sort of roommates. We had his and her cupboards and frequently made different meals. We did our own laundry. Dr. BB did not know my preferred order of doing things in the shower. By the end of the first six months of my recovery, our relationship had shifted so that we were a UNIT. Us against whatever the world was going to throw at us. Pretty good outcome if you ask me. 

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Have you answered these seven questions?  Do you understand what Minnie Driver has to do with it?

Tuesday, January 20, 2015

8.20 Lessons - Procrastination Ends Here

Bestest Friend and I are in the middle of a blog project. Each day of the month we will post a picture on a pre-determined theme and write a little something about it. The theme for the twentieth day of each month is "Lessons."
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Last semester I took on a class about two weeks before the semester started. This was a class I had never taught before and wasn't particularly well versed in through my graduate work.  One of my co-workers swore she would do all the work of creating the course, from the syllabus through the final exam, and all I would need to do was basically stand in front of the room and give her PowerPoint presentations.

Well, she provided the outline of a syllabus and the occasional PowerPoint and I spent most of last semester in a state of panic about having to go teach that damn class.  I was writing assignments for material I hadn't taught yet, desperately tried to come up with essay questions that were appropriate for a disorganized mess of a topic, and was happily plagiarizing any and all lecture material my colleagues would send my way. It took me two weeks after the semester ended before I stopped waking up in the middle of the night freaking out about what in the hell I was going to teach on Wednesday.

This semester is going to be different.  I knew ahead of time what I was going to be teaching. I only have one new prep. I had my syllabi written and copied a week ahead of time. I have most of the assignments written already and an outline of major themes in all the courses.
But mostly I've learned that I'm not really a team player. I can't deal with the idea of collaborating on a class, especially if other people aren't as conscientious about due dates as I am.  Also, never trust a department chair who is making deals with you two weeks before the semester starts.  He or she will not be above straight out lying to you to do his or her bidding.
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To see what Bestest Friend wrote about the theme of the day, check out her blog, Too Legit to Quit.

Monday, November 28, 2016

Five Christmas Ornaments 2016 Style

 It seems as if I frequently put together a list of five ornaments I consider for our ornament of the year (I went with #2 last year), but I was a bit too late in early December last year for some of the shipping deadlines. This year I'm going to do better.

1. Family Map Ornament ($12.50 + $3.95 shipping) from Rosie's Pendants - I think this might be good for some other family. Both of our families live in the Midwest, so this wouldn't be too spread out, but I think it's charming and sort of want to buy one for someone.
2.Family Stick Figure Ornament ($20) from Georgie Designs - I like the simplicity of this one. Just two stick figures for us and one for Zelda. I dig it. Plus, it's not huge. We have a tiny tree and I like that this ornament would fit on it without looking ridiculous. (One more reason for getting behind house buying. I CAN HAVE A FULL SIZED CHRISTMAS TREE.)
3. Bottle Cap Ornaments ($6.50 + $3.50 shipping) from HMSouthernCreations - I really, really, really want one of these made up with the mascots for my undergrad university, Dr. BB's undergrad university, and the university where we went to graduate school. Unfortunately for me, this shop does only southern schools and when I sent a message in the past, she, understandably, didn't have time for my dinky order for schools that are absolutely not in the south. I shall continue to long for this ornament until such time as I buy some bottle caps and resin and make one for myself. 
4. Personalized Photo Ornament Laser Etched ($23 + $3.50 shipping) from Violet Etch - I am strongly considering getting one of these made for my sister and using a photo of her dog and cat.
5. Puzzle Pieces ($29 + $4.75 shipping) from Wooden Heart Buttons - I like that these are sort of fun and Stranger Things-esque.  It also doesn't have the dreaded hearts all over it, but shows love.  I'm seriously tempted by these. If 2014 was the year of zombies because of The Walking Dead, why can't this year be the year of retro eighties horror?
BONUS:
6. Family Tree ($55 + $4.50 shipping) from MandalaRain - I think I'm going to buy this for my mother-in-law.  I know that her time is limited, but I also know she'll love it.  I'm really struggling with this one. 

Tuesday, June 06, 2023

8.6 Reflection - Time Travel

Bestest Friend and I are doing a blog project. Each day we will write a blog post on a different theme chosen by a random noun generator. The theme for the sixth day of the month is "Reflection."

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The son of one of my high school friends graduated from the same high school I did last week! I went to the open house and, as always, it was a bit surreal to go back to my hometown. Some things are the same - FRIENDS! Skate Estate is STILL open just like it was when I was in middle school and the cops still end up there every Saturday night because of fights in the parking lot - but so many things are different - I can't give directions anymore because the store names are all different and Matson's hardware is now a True Value instead of an Ace.  

But you know what isn't different? How I can just sit down with my friends, friends who first met me in third, fifth, and seventh grades, and we can just pick up right where we left off!  Such a lovely feeling and such a full weekend of shenanigans.  

This is Kitty Boy Noodle. He's new to the family since I last visited. His tail is even more impressive than Zelda's, but if you tell Zelda I told you that, I'll never forgive you.

Saturday night I arrived to my friend's house just as everyone was getting back from work and school. We ordered pizza and pestered another mutual friend via text until she also came over. We sat around and talked. I cuddled all their pets. Their kids are all getting older and have either graduated high school or will graduate next year, so there was lots of talk about future plans and empty nests and college costs and who has already had a colonoscopy. You know. The things.

Saturday morning, one of my friends and I went on a walk on the Rogue River on a nature trail near a dam. Then he went off to breakfast with his family and I went to get a car wash because my car was filthy. I took a shower and gathered up a crowd and headed off to the graduation party.  

We signed the things, we ate the cake, we asked about future plans. I gave one of my friends a little lesson on preparing for social interactions. Then we practiced modeling his new social skills and we both laughed and laughed.

1. Brainstorm five topics ahead of time to start with. (What do you do for fun? Have you read a good book lately? Traveling someplace soon? Are you originally from this area?  How do you know the host of the gathering?) 

2. Start with one of the topics and listen to the responses. Ask follow up questions. Be curious!  

3. Always get the conversation to turn around to something you want to actually talk about. (In my case, this is always pets and books. You figure out what you really want to know about other people.)


There you have it. Socialization 101 for introverts. 

But you know who I didn't need to prep to have conversations with? My actual friends.


Do you have idea prompts for what to talk about before you head into social encounters? If not, what's your secret?

Friday, October 18, 2024

Five for Friday, Edition #10

1) Pet update - The woes of my dear girls continue.

Originally, Zelda couldn't get in for the frightening sounding radioactive iodine treatment until January, so we were trying to figure out what we can do in the meantime to help her out. We had about a week's worth of the medicine that was donated to us left and had to order some more. Meanwhile, I purchased a scale whose main purpose is measuring the weight of human infants in order to monitor her weight. 

BUT THEN! They called and said they had a cancellation, so I took her in for her initial consult yesterday. If she's deemed an appropriate candidate, then she'll go in on October 28, which IS REALLLY SOON.

Hannah had her third round of anti-diarrhea medicine and *whomp whomp* it came right back. Now we're doing more blood tests. 

2) Make versus set the table

Because of Zelda's penchant for jumping on the table and my husband's penchant for having overly crazy rules re: food safety, our strategy is that we have placemats we use only for meals that live in a drawer on our dining room table. Before each meal, we take them out and place them on the table and then we put them back in the drawer at the end of each meal. Easy peasy.

It is easy. You know what's not easy? For me to figure out what to call this. I think the "correct" usage is "set the table." Hey, I'm plating dinner, can you set the table? That's right, I think. BUT THAT'S NOT WHAT I SAY. I say "make the table." Can you make the table? Because you MAKE A BED and my brain does not understand that these are two separate idioms. 

3) In the mail 

I have been woefully remiss in not acknowledging all the dear people who are sending me snail mail! My husband recently observed that I get more snail mail than anyone else he knows. I love it all. If you've sent me something recently, please know I love it and I've taken it to my office to hang up with all my other postcards. (Allison, the wax seal sort of worked. It was still sealed shut, but any decorative bit did not make it through international travel.)


4) NaBloPoMo

I'm quite excited about NaBloPoMo next month, although I have to admit to starting to stockpile ideas from Bloglandia. If anyone asks a question or makes a fun post idea, I have started writing it down because while I do write most weekdays, I feel the additional weekend posts may be a real struggle for me this year. ALSO! Commenting! When will I have time to comment?  I'll have to figure it out. 

5) Work joys

Last Friday a lady called me from North Carolina. She tells me that she's 78-years-old and she went to my school in the 1960s and she never graduated. She wants to finish her degree. Ha ha ha. I email the registrar's office for her transcript and take a look - transcripts from the 60s are wild - and sat down to figure out a plan for her to graduate. What a fun part of my job!

I met with a student (first year who brought it like 30 credits of AP/dual enrollment/whatever else) and I created a path for her to graduate with a graduation date of May 2027. She was so excited and - I swear this is a direct quote - said "it makes graduating seem so real." I was excited by her excitement, although the niggling voice in the back of my head was saying "those fifteen credits you're taking right now didn't make it real?" Let's ignore that back of my head voice. 

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Who else is doing NaBloPoMo? What's a recent joy in your life? 

Monday, June 14, 2010

Fuckity Fuck Fuck Fuck

When we came back from walking around the lake on Friday night, my phone showed nine missed calls, all of them from my sister, my mother, and my cousin. Oh, shit. When I finally was able to reach my sister, she told me that my father had died.

He was 56 years old. We just didn't expect this right now.

I've spent the last two days making lists, phone calls, and meals. I'm pissed off. I'm stuck in Michigan, a place I try to avoid like some people avoid north Minneapolis. I can't believe he did this. And on a fucking Friday to boot. You can't get shit done on a weekend. It's like his last move was to piss me off as much as possible.

We weren't super close and, as the outsider coming in to clean things up, I'm going through all the paperwork he left behind and I see more and more reasons why we weren't close. It's a mess, a giant mess. My mom did some smart moves and protected herself financially in a lot of ways and I'm super proud of her and how she's dealing with all of this, but it's still a fucking morass of awfulness.

Meanwhile, I'm stuck in the middle of nowhere, my phone only gets reception if I drive three miles away, and my poor husband has been reduced to eating packaged foods because the kitchen here is not set up for him to eat.

I'm sure that in the weeks and months to come I'll write mushy, maudlin words devoted to his memory, but right now, just know that if he were still alive, I'd kick his ass.

According to Kubler-Ross, the five stages are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Right now I'm on anger and I'm pretty sure I'm going to be there for quite some time. Tomorrow we're doing a visitation thing and I need a better answer to "how are you doing?" than "I'm really pissed off." I'll play nice, I'll think of something, but if happen to run into me anytime soon, know that what I'm really thinking is that this sucks even worse than my first year of graduate school.

Friday, March 29, 2024

Five for Friday Edition #3: Work Things

1) I keep a document at work where every day I document what my "big" projects were during the day. For example, on March 7, I met with students on probation/warning and worked with a student who is returning after a long time out of school (she started when in 1997! her last semester was 2002!) to figure out her fastest route to graduation. Today I was frantically trying to figure out what I did all day and it seemed like the answer might be "a whole lot of nothing," but looking at my sent folder in email, it turns out that I spent the day emailing people questions. 

I don't share this document with anyone, but if my boss asks what projects I've been working on, I can consult it. Do you keep a document like this or am I just desperately trying to justify my position?

2) Because of (incredibly boring) work reasons, I recently pulled out my college transcript, which I have handy because I was on the job market for a long time. I saw this


and got all hepped up all over again from grudges from the 1990s. I graduated from college with a GPA of 3.97 and the first two things you see on my undergrad transcript are a B (the only one I ever got in college) and a remedial English course. You GUYS. It's been more than a quarter of a century and I'm still livid. They couldn't have buried that B in amongst the As somewhere? The guy who taught that econ class STILL TEACHES AT MY ALMA MATER. 

If you went to college, take a look at your transcript. It's a fun trip down memory lane. Also, I have some questions. I did an internship the summer of 1999 at then-U.S. Senator Mike DeWine's district office in Toledo and it ended up on my transcript as COOP 50 for ZERO credits with a grade of "S." Why even bother putting that on there?! I have so many questions. My program didn't require an internship and I did another internship in DC in the fall of 2000, so what was going on here? WHY?

3) I have a number of tchotchkes in my office. People buy me stuff and there's no place to put it in our house since I'm forbidden from putting things in the curio cabinet

Why did Bestest Friend send me a green boot? I don't know, but I have an odd affection for it. 

Anyway, I bring this up because about a decade ago Bestest Friend sent me a weird ceramic chicken.

I thought it would be with all the other work tchotchkes, but I can not find my chicken and I'm heartbroken about the whole thing. My office is missing an element of insanity without this chicken.

4) For a variety of reasons (*ahem* the enrollment and demand cliffs *ahem*), our university has been reaching out to students who have some college credits, but did not earn a degree at our institution. This is a population of great concern because these students frequently have a fair amount of debt related to education, but without a degree, their economic mobility can be limited. As part of my job, I sometimes talk to these potential students to help them figure out what the fastest path is for them to graduate.

I've been working with a woman who needs 2-3 credits in a work experience to complete her minor to graduate. That's it. That's what she needs. But she doesn't want to do the work experience and so she's considering changing her minor entirely to avoid doing the work experience. But a new minor would be at least 12 credits, if not more!! WHY?!?!

5) I recently had a milestone anniversary at my current employer (ten years) and went to a program to celebrate it. (Look, my boss was celebrating her 25th anniversary and that's why I really went. She would have been IRATE if her crew wasn't there and I know this about her. She said "oh, no worries if you can't go," but what she meant was "you better be there and I better hear you screaming for me." I am nothing if not an astute judge of character.*) ANYWAY. The event was streamed and one of my friends was home sick that day and she sent me a screenshot of me and I laughed and laughed. Why am I walking like that? Sole first? What a weirdo.

*This is patently false, you all know this, right? I am absolutely oblivious to about 80% of social cues and customs and sometimes think I'm a robot. But I do know my boss well enough to know she likes to be celebrated. And since I like to celebrate, who am I to not go to a celebratory event?

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Do you have knickknacks in your office? Do you have a favorite one? Do you have a college or high school transcript that you have questions about?