Bestest Friend and I are doing a blog project. Each day we will write a blog post on a pre-determined theme chosen by a random noun generator. The theme for the twelfth day of the month is "Complaint."
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As regular readers may remember, I have Dental Woes. Basically, I have terrible gums and my teeth are professionally cleaned every three months. I alternate appointments between my periodontist and my family dentist. I have complaints about both.
My beloved former family dentist retired a couple of years ago and he sold his practice to a guy who lives in another state and only comes in twice a week. He changed the name of the practice from an easily Googleable name to The Dentist, which is seriously a terrible name if you're considering search engines at all. ANYWAY. The former dentist was great. He knew about my issues, he was always optimistic and impressed with how consistent my teeth were.
This dentist. He always acts like this is the first time he's seen my mouth. There's so much mobility! You have deep pockets in your gums! How did your gums get this way? All of this is true. I'm not denying it. But my periodontal disease has maintained for the last decade and it's not like it's gotten noticeably worse in the six months between appointments with this guy, I SWEAR. It makes me feel like the hours I'm devoting to dental care every week are wasted and I shouldn't bother trying and I'm going to end up toothless anyway.
And I end up crying on the way home after every appointment. I am giving him one more appointment and if it happens again, I'm going to find a new dentist. I hate to have to find a new dentist because I'll have train a whole new dentist and hygienist, but it shouldn't be this soul crushing to go the dentist, should it?
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| My husband goes to a different dentist than I do and they gave him this creepy chip clip. I refuse to use it in the kitchen. |
And my periodontist. There are a lot of good things about that office. The hygienists are used to seeing a lot of bad mouths and mine is like the least worst of what they see. They're always so complimentary of my hygiene and their cleanings are like a billion times more thorough than my stupid family dentist. But, like, I haven't actually seen a periodontist in two years? They're never in the office? The hygienists take notes and say they'll pass it on to the doctor, but I get charged the same exorbitant rate regardless of if I see an actual doctor or not, so I'd prefer to see one. The last time I scheduled an appointment, I specifically requested that it be a day when a periodontist would be in the office and when I showed up, both doctors were on vacation.
So, I don't even know really why I'm writing all this out. I used to have a good system with my dental professionals, but it's all fallen apart and I hate change and I don't want to think about it too much.
Do you have a mouth-shaped chip clip? Would you like one? I can procure one for you!
Gah--I'm sorry! Your decision to give it one more try and then move on sounds reasonable. Yes, you'll have to train the new people... but it sounds like the current one treats you like a first-timer every time anyway.
ReplyDeleteExactly! If I was seeing him for the first time, it would be different. But it's been several appointments!
DeleteUgh ugh ugh. The fact that you have to deal with having touchy teeth is ENOUGH, you should not also have to deal with a dentist who acts surprised and alarmed about them! I might consider finding another dentist now, even though I hear you about how hard it is to find someone new and then train them. Plus the devil you know, etc. I totally get that. My guess is this guy is never going to change his sensitivity level, though, and you should not have to cry after leaving! That's awful.
ReplyDeleteThe periodontist thing is really irritating, too! UGH!
I do not have a mouth-shaped chip clip, nor do I want one. That thing is creepy!
My husband keeps that clip in his desk drawer and when I asked him for it so I could take the photo, he laughed at me because I refused to look to see where he stores it in his desk. It IS so creepy!
DeleteOh, Engie. I'm just so sorry you're going through this. So many layers of challenge and frustration here. I'm saddened that your new dentist is behaving this way; how unprofessional and also...just insensitive. Grrr. Dentists (like doctors) are seeing people at their most vulnerable. They need to be sensitive and kind! Why is this not a pre-requisite. I don't care about standardized test scores as much as I care about bedside manner (though, obviously, we want them to be up to par with their knowledge, too!).
ReplyDeleteI 100% understand hesitation to move to another clinic because of having to get them familiarized with your history, but agree with Suzanne that it's unlikely to get better at this clinic. I wish I had connections to a great option in your city and could point you in the right direction; hopefully a combo of Google reviews and maybe some word-of-mouth will help? Could the hygienist at the periodontist perhaps be brought into the loop and see if she has a suggestion?
Well, I can't change periodontists at all. I'm already traveling more than 30 minutes to this office and I'm unwilling to travel further. I might call closer to my next appointment and doublecheck that a doctor will be in the office that day, though.
DeleteChanging family dentists is possible, but the dentists in this area all have a waiting list of 6-8 months to get an appointment, so in order to keep my every three month cleaning, I can't realistically start making other appointments until after my already scheduled next appointment. There are a couple of dentists I've heard good things about, so I think if this guy doesn't shape up (and it's very likely he won't), then I'll have to move on.
That is so frustrating on both ends of it! Switching dentists is the worst - however, it may be worth the work of getting "in" with a new practice based on how this one is treating you (and the not-easily-Googleable name change!!), even if having to go through the whole story with new folks is not fun.
ReplyDeleteYou're right. It's not fun going over the whole story with someone new, but he is acting like it's a new story every time he sees me, so maybe I should just move on.
DeleteI'm so sorry. I have a ridiculous-level fear of dentists/dental work, thanks to a truly terrible childhood dentist who was actually abusive and cruel. Just walking into the dentist's office makes me cry. I have to be sedated for everything. So, probably my advice is incredibly biased, but I'd jump ship immediately and find new specialists. You don't need this kind of treatment, and you're paying for it, too. Elisabeth, above, is right: researching reviews and getting some input from people you know is a great place to start.
ReplyDeleteGood luck. As far as I can tell, you can only do better from here.
Right, well, as I said in an above comment, I can't really switch perios because there just isn't anyone to switch to! I'll definitely start searching out reviews for other family dentists, though. This just can't continue this way.
DeleteUgh! The same thing happened to me- my dentist, who I had been going to for years and LOVED, retired and sold the practice to another guy. I have no issues with the new guy, other than the fact that I always have the nagging feeling that he's not telling me the truth. Like, every single time there's some "little" issue with a tooth that needs to be taken care of. But it's not like anything was hurting- I just have to take his word for it. Is this how he pays his bills? By charging everyone $200 (or more) a pop to replace a filling or add a little composite to a tooth that's supposedly worn down? On the one hand I don't want to neglect my teeth, but on the other hand how am I supposed to know what's really going on? I guess it's just that I trusted my old dentist implicitly, and I don't know this guy well enough to trust him yet.
ReplyDeleteBut, my problems are not as big as yours. I agree with the other commenters that you should find a new dentist, although I know that's easier said than done. Going to the dentist shouldn't make you cry. The periodontist situation is also very frustrating. I don't know enough about periodontal care to know how important it is that you see an actual doctor. But like you said, you pay the same rate either way so it doesn't seem like it's too much to ask to see a doctor SOME of the time.
Good luck with it- I'm sorry you have to go through all this.
Oh, yes to the nickel and diming that happens! This is super true at the periodontist's office. It used to be run by this old guy and it was just a super thorough cleaning, but then a new guy became a partner and now there are laser treatments, super flouride washes, and the mouthwash that is a placebo (https://ngradstudent.blogspot.com/2022/02/the-placebo-effect-is-real-or-how-i.html). I always say yes, but when I do research later, it's not always something I'd say yes to if I had known to do that research beforehand! Ugh. I mean, it's just hard to know what's absolutely necessary.
DeleteThat first guy sounds like someone who has no memory for faces or people. Some people are like that.
ReplyDeleteThat's fine. He should look at my chart ahead of time, then! It's kind of traumatic for me to rehash it all over again every time and he has it all written down!
DeleteMy personal opinion is that your relationship with your medical professionals should be treated the same as any other personal relationship - if they make you feel like crap then they need to be out of your life. I vote for not giving this guy another chance and going somewhere else for your next visit.
ReplyDeleteWell, I can't get into a new dentist on that little notice in my area. Most dentists are scheduling out 6-8 months, so this guy is going to get one more chance. Let's see how it goes for him!
DeleteOMG that is terrible bedside manner! I'd find another dentist. I, too, have periodontal issues (reseeding gums and grinding) and always ask for topical anesthetic - my teeth are so sensitive. Especially when they use that dreaded machine to clean your teeth.
ReplyDeleteYeah, my gum pockets are very deep, so the Cavitron is the only way to clean them. I just take Tylenol and go about my day. But if the topical works for you, that's great!
DeleteOh dear, no, it shouldn't be this soul crushing to go the dentist! If this guy hasn't gotten up to speed on your condition yet, and apparently can't even bother to look at your file first, then boot him without hesitation! I hate change too, but sometimes you're better off changing. Ugh.
ReplyDeleteYes! Why isn't he looking at my chart first if he doesn't remember me?! WHY?!
DeleteUgh, I'm so sorry your new dentist is such a dick. I hope you can get a brand new dentist and after the getting to know you portion of the program, they will be much, much better. I mean, don't they have charts? DO THEY NOT LOOK AT A CHART? This should not be so much hassle. Also, why pay for a GD PERIODONTIST WHEN THE PERIODONTIST IS NOT THERE that is so unfair!!! Ugh, ugh UGH. So sorry, Engie. This sucks.
ReplyDeleteAlso, my son's former drum teacher had a band called Website. TRY GOOGLING WEBSITE, I DARE YOU. I mean, what a stupid idea. That's almost as stupid as The Dentist.
A band called Website!! LOLOLOL. I'm going to laugh when thinking about that for days. The Dentist. Even if you Google "The Dentist" AND "town name," his business isn't on the first page of results! What a dumb name.
DeleteThat chip clip is just ... NO!
ReplyDeleteI feel your pain re the dentist. You certainly want to have a dentist you trust. I feel like it is a very vulnerable position in the chair and the right dentist can make it a little bit easier. We decided to go to a new dentist when we moved because it was a 45min drive (or more depending on traffic) to get back to our old one, but it was nerve wracking. The one I went to is really nice, was very complimentary about the way I look after my teeth but he wasn't quite as gentle on the clean as our old one.
I can't believe the periodontist gets away with charging you the same amount when they don't even see you. That's shonky!
It IS crazy that the periodontist can charge the same with or without the doctor. No one is really doing a thorough exam this way, right?! I don't understand medical billing at all.
DeleteI want that chip clip. Full stop. Might need to switch dentists. I am also giving mine one more shot and then leaving. It should NOT feel bad to go to the dentist-- besides the poking, scraping, etc.
ReplyDeleteYou can have that chip clip. If we ever meet in person, it's totally yours!
DeleteI can't have that chip clip because the teeth don't line up and that irks me. 😳
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry you are having dental woes; like you already have issues, the Dentist/No-show Periodontist aren't helping. I say, you look for a new dentist as there are a lot of good ones out there.
My Dentist that I had forever (like 20 years) retired and I really do like the replacement guy; he's a younger version and very sweet. I feel like I got lucky!
I was willing to give the new guy a chance, I really was. I miss my old dentist so much. Maybe he could come out of retirement just to do my cleanings?
DeleteOh wow, that is frustrating that you aren't having a great experience at either place. I'm glad the hygienists are good at the peri place but not seeing an actual doctor seems odd! And what was this guy thinking naming the business "The Dentist." That's like an onion article "man moves to town and names practice The Dentist".
ReplyDeleteI traveled w/ a sale rep in May who had to have a gum grafting procedure or something like that?? It sounds truly awful. I hope that is not something you'll ever have to do!
Ha. My gums are far too gone for a gum grafting procedure. There's nothing to graft onto. I had a surgery that basically removed all the dead gum tissue and allowed the remaining healthy gum tissue to be cleaned appropriately. This is possible way more medical info than some people want, I'm realizing!
DeleteThis sounds awful and very frustrating, Engie. You already have to deal with troublesome teeth, at the very least you should be able to have good dental care and be able to see your dentist/periodontist when you request it. I think you have been more than fair to this dentist, and it might be time to move on after this next cleaning. :(
ReplyDeleteSide note: I'm kinda obsessed with that chip clip.
That chip clip is bad vibes, man. Bad vibes.
DeleteWould I like a a mouth-shaped chip clip? No, thank you LOL .
ReplyDeleteUgh, I am so sorry about the dentist woes. I am very good about my 6-month cleanings/maintenance but only because I LOVE my hygienist and I'd fall apart if he left. I can absolutely feel your pain, esp, if you're having more issues than other people and you had a good thing going... it's hard to deal with new people who don't even remember you (and you go more often than other people!). I do hope you find a new/better practice, if you decide you have to move on.
Oh, this dental practice used to have THE best hygienist. When she left, I actually asked the front desk where she went and they simply said that they she went to a different practice in the city where my perio is, but didn't give me any more details. *sigh* Hey, Brooke the Hygienist, if you're still in this area of Wisconsin, please let me know where you're working today!! You're so lucky you have a great relationship with yours and I'm green with envy over here.
DeleteOh, ugh. Dental woes and dentist issues are a terrible, horrible combination. But I cannot EVEN with your dentist. I would want to sit up (avoiding the pointy objects, of course) and ask, pointedly, have you ever read my chart? Do you even know my name, or remember my dental history? Because it sure doesn't sound like it. This is my fantasy, though, as real me would just lie there and curse him in my head. :( And the not-really-a-periodontist appointments are not right, either. I understand you're stuck on that one. But I do hope you ditch The Dentist (dummbbb...) and find someone new. (My own dentist disappeared for a year or so, shifting all of her patients to a new guy, who ... no one ever told me about! He just appeared one day, to check my teeth. And then he did all of my procedures. And then when the first dentist did reappear? She was... different. Makes me wonder if there was a medical issue that required her to give up her practice, as she now basically functions as the receptionist...) And good grief, this is a long dentist comment. Stopping now!
ReplyDelete