(TL;DR: Our Labor Day family reunion is really fun and a lot of work.)
It was such a flurry of Blogiversary posts that I almost forgot to update you all on the big Labor Day extravaganza.
Last year, I sort of off-handedly mentioned it, but this year I'm going to do a full recap of Labor Day and tell all of you as many of the logistics as I know since you all clamored for it before.
Planning
Planning for Labor Day starts taking place at the beginning of the summer. We start asking around, trying to figure out who is planning on being there to get a rough idea of numbers for ordering food, reserving golf tee times, and getting any other reservations we might need. If we have full attendance, it's almost 60 people (58 to be precise). This number can vary a little as people get sick, single people bring plus ones, etc. Sometimes people have to miss, but most of the time people prioritize it and it's not unusual to have near perfect attendance. I have not missed a Labor Day since Dr. BB and I started dating. (We did not hold it during 2020 because you might recall that there was a pesky global pandemic.)
We know the schedule will be Friday night through Sunday night of Labor Day weekend, so folks who aren't local can either get hotel rooms or find someone local to stay with. By my count, roughly 20 folks will need hotel rooms. We are not local, but we stay with Dr. BB's father so we don't need to get a hotel room. We have stayed with my husband's brother in the past, too, so there are options for us.
Who Hosts It?
This has varied throughout the years, but for the last five years or so we've hosted it at Dr. BB's father's house. His house is ginormous. I think it's a six bedroom, five bath? Truthfully I have only been on the second floor twice, so it's possible I'm wrong. It has a three car garage and a relatively large suburban backyard. My FIL, his wife, Dr. BB's two sisters and their families, and Dr. BB and I stay at the house.
Most of the events take place outside. I'll get into the agenda later, but tables are set up in the garage and that's where most of the action takes place. People can eat inside at the kitchen or dining room table, as well.
Who Organizes It?
Well, my husband's aunts used to. But recently it has fallen to Dr. BB's siblings, particularly his sisters. One of his sisters sends out an email with details about the agenda and food assignments roughly a month out. In terms of what other organization takes place beforehand, I'm afraid I do not know. At this point, there is a binder that gets passed around with rough estimates of amounts of food, golf times, and the like, so a lot of work is just repeated from year to year and Dr. BB's sister just has to delegate assignments.
One of my husband's brothers organizes the golf and makes the reservations. My FIL's wife reserves the softball field. Backyard game and euchre tournaments are organized by one of my husband's cousins. We call him The Commissioner and he is the umpire at softball, too.
What's the agenda?
The final agenda was sent on August 21 this year. Here's what it looks like. Bless my SIL because she included details like locations and whether or not to bring a change of clothes, towels, sporting equipment, etc. I will spare you those details.
Meet at the house - chat and relax
How does food work?
Drinks: Every nuclear family brings their own cooler with drinks and the coolers are scattered all along the perimeter of the garage. I honestly have no idea how the ice is refilled, but I think the golfers deal with that on their way back from golf. (ICE FAIRIES. I know I've never personally refilled the ice in our cooler, but we always have ice. Probably my own husband is the ice fairy. I've never asked.)
Dessert: Every single woman brings dessert (except me - more on that later) even though that means we have way too many desserts every single year. One of the aunts makes a very popular snack mix that includes peanuts, chocolate chips, plain M&Ms, and raisins. (I find this mix revolting.)
Candy: My FIL's wife is obsessed with candy and there is candy EVERYWHERE. Bowls of M&Ms placed on every table, more candy than we purchase for Halloween in bowls in the living and dining rooms. If you want candy, you can find it.
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| Kids getting food. Just a regular Labor Day meal. |
Friday night: Light snacks are provided. This year it was small sandwiches and wraps purchased from the local grocery store. There's usually a meat and cheese tray. Who pays for this? I presume my FIL, but I've never really asked.
Saturday lunch: My SIL has designated assignments for everyone. The sandwiches and wraps that weren't eaten Friday get set out. Someone was assigned Frito and corn salad, someone else has one of those three crockpot things and she does two cheese dips and weenies, I was assigned a salad, another SIL was assigned a salad, someone else was assigned a fruit tray. My FIL's wife made some strawberry fluff and dared to set it next to the salads instead of the desserts. Someone makes Kraft mac & cheese, and that's how lunch works. Leftovers are set out when golfers get back.
Saturday dinner: Leftovers are set out again (the three crockpot thing always makes a comeback). I was assigned another salad, as was another SIL. Italian beef and pulled pork sandwiches, hot dogs on the grill, pasta salad, and potato salad are provided. I know my FIL pays for all this from Sam's Club or Costco or someplace like that.
Sunday brunch: This is catered from the local grocery store (Hy-Vee). It includes orange juice, coffee, bacon, sausage, breakfast pizzas, donuts, a fruit salad, and scrambled eggs that taste like plastic (every year we complain about the eggs and every year someone orders them again). I set out my leftover salad because otherwise I would not eat anything from this particular meal. I don't know who pays for it, but I suspect the aunts do.
Sunday dinner: One of the uncles pays for pizza and all leftovers are set out. In previous years someone has ordered a sheet cake for dinner, but heaven help us all there are always so many desserts. This year they did not order a cake and I promise you that no one was asking for it.
What food do we bring?
Obviously we bring a cooler of drinks. We both had Gatorade, Dr. BB had Coke, and I had Fresca. We also both made liberal use of tap water.
Dr. BB packs his own food for the weekend. He will not eat from a buffet and does not trust any of the cookware to be safe from cross-contamination. He's living off yogurt and granola, kefir, granola bars, individually packed guacamole and hummus, crackers, almonds, cheese sticks, and Amy's frozen dinners.
I brought a lettuce salad (this salad) for lunch on Saturday, my green bean salad for dinner on Saturday/brunch on Sunday. I also brought yogurt and granola for me for Saturday and Sunday mornings. Next year I might volunteer to make some egg dishes for Sunday brunch because the egg situation is gross. They have quiches at Costco and I can definitely make a crustless egg bake for the GF folks. Also, I'm super grossed out the meat and cheese tray because they use lunch meat and that's disgusting. I might just buy a yard of beef and some precut cheese at Costco next year. (My philosophy is that if I'm unhappy with something at Labor Day, I should change it. I've been super sad about the meat and cheese tray, so...)
We do not bring desserts because there are already so many and this bitch does not have time to deal with salads AND figuring out a dessert. No one has ever called me out for skipping my dessert making duty.
Is it fun?
YES! It's just structured enough that no one gets bored, but there's enough downtime to just sit down and chat with Uncle George. The kids love seeing the cousins they don't see very often and even the teenagers seem to have a good time. There's a lot of playing of random games in the backyard and (mostly) girls coloring and making friendship bracelets. The weather is usually pretty good over Labor Day weekend - we have had an occasional rainy day - and it helps that we can be mostly outdoors.
(Kinda gross paragraph ahead. Skip if it you like.) This year was a bit annoying because I had that cyst thing and I was in a fair amount of discomfort all weekend. My SIL the doctor looked at it and acknowledged that it was very angry looking and told me to take hot showers multiple times a day and encourage it to drain. Meanwhile I was taking ibuprofen and doing warm compresses and was really struggling. I do not want to talk about what happened in that shower in terms of the cyst draining (GROSS), but the weekend is so much fun that I was determined not to let it get me down.
This year one of my SILs had been traveling for work and was due to arrive at the local airport on Saturday afternoon. I volunteered to pick her up while her husband and son were still golfing and everyone else was swimming. I had a few of my nieces make a poster that said Welcome Back Aunt Rebecca as a Saturday morning project before everyone else arrived for lunch and they were truly excited to have a Super Important Project and they concentrated on it for almost an hour. I was truly excited to bring this sign with me to the airport.
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| You can see donuts and muffins here on the table. Clearly healthy eating is not of utmost importance during Labor Day weekend. |
I picked her from the airport complete with dancing and screaming her name and waving her poster around (truly, friends, I was too busy being an idiot to document this and I'm sort of glad no photographic evidence of it exists) and I asked her where she wanted to go, thinking she'd say her house or my FIL's house. She said, "I want to go get ice cream." LOLOLOLOL. I hope you can see why I volunteered to pick her up at the airport.
We went to Dairy Queen.
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It's so much fun. Now that most of the kids are older (we have one 2-year-old and then all the kids are at least six or seven) and can basically run wild without adult supervision, I think everyone has a good time. The parents of the 2-year-old can get stressed, but he's pretty chill for two and everyone's so baby starved that we'll even take the screaming kid away from the parents to help them relax a little. Honestly, I'm sorry that all of you can't experience my husband's family's reunion because it's really a good time. Undoubtedly I would feel differently if I were hosting, but I think we do a nice job of making sure the hosts don't have to take on too much responsibility.
Is it a super spreader event?
Yes. Every year we've held it since the pandemic multiple people have tested positive for COVID afterwards. So far we've avoided it, but it also means that for the first week of classes I was wearing a mask and being a very cool person.
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Okay, I'm bored with my own retelling. What questions do you have left? Does this event sound like fun or like a nightmare to you? Would you act like a crazy person picking someone up from the airport?
FUN!!!! As you know, my favorite thing in life is huge family parties with my inlaws. I don't do "fun" things like golf or softball, but I do like to hang out with people and eat.
ReplyDeleteThe craziest thing that I've done at an airport is when the boys get back from their long summer scouting trips. Usually there are about 3 of us to pick the troop up, and last year we chanted the troop number when we saw them. So we could definitely up our game there. It's fun.
You definitely need to up your airport game! Signs, balloons, dances. I feel like there's some real room for increased silliness.
DeleteIt's so great they do this every year. It sounds like a lot of fun - a lot of work, but it seems like it gets divided up a lot. I think it sounds great, honestly, and I would be down with those desserts. We had our family reunion this year and it's the first one I had been to in decades. It was such a great time! I was low-level concerned about my own food situation because I'm the only person who doesn't eat meat, but it turned out there were so many salads, sides, veg and fruit plates, and desserts that I was just fine.
ReplyDeleteYeah, there's plenty for me to eat, too, because we have upped the salad game since I've come along. It used to be fruit or bust for me, but I have consistently started bringing salads as my assigned side dish for the last decade or so and some others have followed suit. It wasn't always this way! You really do sometimes have to make your own happiness/food situation happen.
DeleteWow! This is insane! 58 people. To be honest it kinda sounds like my worst nightmare - group gatherings are not my thing - but if I knew everyone and wasn't the one organizing I bet I'd LOVE it.
ReplyDeleteWe had a biggish family reunion in 1993 and then of course a smattering of people at different weddings, but everyone is so spread out we never get the whole family together. Ever.
Plastic eggs don't sound fun, though. I feel like mass-produced egg dishes are rarely acceptable (I've had ONE dish of hotel buffet eggs that were knock-your-socks off good and the rest are mostly dire and something I elect to skip).
Yes, since it's all people we know and most of them we know pretty well, it's all pretty fun. There were only two new people this year (single people's plus ones), so it's always easy for me to welcome the new people and enjoy hearing how everyone else's life is going.
DeleteI always go for eggs at breakfast buffets because I don't eat breakfast meat and it's frequently the only protein available, but the eggs are so disgusting. I can't really deal with it, to be honest!
This is the kind of thing my mother's side of the family used to do for holidays. There were about the same number of people, but the big entertainment was always a slide show (the old fashioned projector kind) of past gatherings, people's trips, etc. It was incredibly boring, and all of us kids hated it. I really dreaded these big gatherings. The food was always pretty good, but the rest of it was just Too Much and Too Long. That side of the family is huge and hugely clannish; they always want to do things in a huge group. For example, if I would go visit one aunt, she would automatically call any nearby family and invite them over. That makes me crazy.
ReplyDeleteThat does sound HORRIBLE. I can see why you don't have fond memories of it, to be honest. I do worry that some of our non-sporty family members, particularly the children, feel like it's too focused on competition and sports and they may end up resenting it in the future. We try to have other sorts of events planned, but a lot of times it is about movement. *sigh*
DeleteWe also do split up, so it's not all 60 of us going out at any given time! I can't even imagine us going around in that huge group the whole time.
This does sound like fun!!! And so, so midwest. My grandmother used to make something very similar to the "strawberry fluff." Jello with marshmallows, fruit, and whipped cream... and yes, it was strangely considered a "salad." It was also the only time we ever saw fruit in her house. She and my grandfather both lived well into their 90s, so maybe we should all be eating jello salads??? (ew... so gross.)
ReplyDeleteAnyway, this sounds fun to me because everyone is free to roam around and do their own thing. And there's enough people so that if someone- me- needed to sneak back to their bedroom to nap or read for a little, no one would even notice.
Yeah, there are a lot of Covid cases again, but you just have to live your life and hope for the best. Enough time has passed since Labor Day- I think you guys are in the clear.
Do not disparage Jello salad, Jenny. Fluff is delicious! Strawberry Jello salad is good! I refuse to acknowledge that you think ill of Jello salads!
DeleteMy husband regularly disappears into our room for a respite. There are so many people that no one even notices if one person is missing.
What a grand and highly organized affair! A few years ago, we had two get-togethers with much of Sue's family, which is less impressive than yours. It was also not nearly as highly organized as yours. It was mostly for the kids to be with their cousins. Sue's snotty sister or stand-offish brother stayed away.
ReplyDeleteIt is really fun to see the kids running around together. I enjoy it very much and even the snotty people come! I just try to avoid them.
Delete"I might just buy a yard of beef and some precut cheese at Costco"
ReplyDeleteI am very curious about the yard of beef! Please tell me more!
They have giant rolls of summer sausage at Costco - three pounds of deliciousness! It's great for large groups. I don't know why, but lunch meat really grosses me out (okay, I do know why - it's the chronic recalls of lunch meat because of Listeria outbreaks) and the summer sausage somehow seems better to me?
DeleteGood golly Miss Molly! What an event. I love that you bring a cooler of drinks because that's practical and easy. As for would I enjoy planning this, maybe. Enjoy hosting it, no. Would I attend every year, yes.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I enjoy my tiny bit of planning (I had to buy a poster board this year!) and my attendance, but there's no way I would host it! I think we're in 100% agreement.
DeleteThis sounds like SO MUCH FUN!! It sounds a lot like the family get togethers back home! (Except for the organizing--and I suspect the organizing makes it more equitable and manageable.)
ReplyDeleteNow that I'm thinking about it... I have no idea how any stuff got done... fairies (like your ice fairies) probably and a few key aunts and tons of domestic helpers.
DeleteSometimes I think my FIL's wife would appreciate domestic helpers to follow around the children and pick up/vacuum after them. LOLOLOL. It's definitely manageable on my end - not sure if that's universally accepted as the case for all the women in the family.
DeleteHa. I laughed so much at the snack mix that repulses you: raisins, M & Ms, etc. Too funny. This sounds like a lot of fun, esp because there seems to be something for everyone. I started out wondering which side of the family this was, but that became clear right away. Coach's side does something similar every few years when his two out of state sibs come in town. There are no cousins or aunts/uncles local - as in Coach's cousins, aunts, uncles, so it's just us but still a big crowd. I do enjoy it . . . so long as I keep a wide-arc of distance from my FIL. He has chilled over the years, but he is an opinionated, over-bearing ass. This year we did this over July 4th and a few of our kids had other plans, like regular plans with good friends and they're old enough to decide what they want to do, so I said "Go, do your thing and enjoy." I love a SIL (is that who you picked up from the airport) who opts to buy a little time away from the big shin-dig by getting ice cream. I do not think I would've been a crazy person picking someone up at the airport. O'Hare doesn't have much patience for those who linger while waiting to pick someone up. Glad you enjoy it and I hope your egg dish is a welcome addition next year.
ReplyDeleteThat snack mix is plain milk chocolate (gag), raisins (super gag), and peanuts (the only edible thing in the whole thing). It is not at all appealing to me, but others love it, so more power to them!
DeleteI've spent some time lingering in O'Hare. Planes get delayed, yo. No one has ever hassled me. Maybe I just look like someone you shouldn't bother hassling with my ereader and dorky glasses.
That sounds like a lot of fun and a lot of work! I would enjoy something like that with our family, but I also know me. Eventually, I would have to sneak off to re-charge for a bit as it would be overwhelming.
ReplyDeleteMy husband certainly spends time alone in our room recharging. When people ask me where he is, I plead ignorance!
DeleteWow! That's a lot of people!! I love that there's an ice fairy! I love that there's lots of candy and desserts! I get overwhelmed by large crowds, but it sounds like getting some down time is easy. Your family sounds like fun!
ReplyDeleteIt's such a good time and I don't take it for granted that the family get togethers happen. I know they don't in every family.
DeleteI've never known anyone to go all out for Labor Day. I like it! Sounds like a lot of fun, deli meat tray aside. BTW, many years ago, a coworker served that Frito corn salad at a potluck and I loved it so much, I asked for the recipe. I have made it many times since, often at potlucks, and it's always a big hit.
ReplyDeletePeople make fun our Midwestern salads, but they're the ones missing out. Frito corn salad is GOOD.
DeleteWow, that is quite the event! We really never do much for Labor Day (well, unless you count 2007, that one year we GOT MARRIED on Labor Day weekend! lol). It's just not great timing otherwise though even for an anniversary trip or weekend away really since the kids have historically always started school right after and I feel like I'm always more in "let's wind down the summer and get ready for back to school" mode. But obviously many other people do fun things on Labor Day weekend!!
ReplyDeleteI think I could like this event, with the right people. I can get a little overwhelmed when it's a lot of time of a lot of people- this type of scenario happens a lot when we go to Mexico. But I mean, hey, why not live it up!? It seems like a really great thing that is creating major "core memories" for everyone involved. I think it seems great!!
Yeah, it is sometimes super annoying because we get home and the semester starts the next day, but sometimes it's nice to have a break before the semester starts! It was a smart choice for them to pick Labor Day weekend because most people don't have regular plans that weekend, so most people can go. It's fun!
DeleteOh- and I forgot to say- there's no excuse to have a subpar meat and cheese platter in Wisconsin!! Definitely agree with changing that.
ReplyDeleteWell, it's in Iowa, so...they don't respect the charcuterie the way we do.
DeleteGetting fifty eight people together is a hard task, and y'all make it happen! WOW. I'm so impressed. I love a good family reunion and this one sounds lovely, especially since all the tasks (hard work) is shared and organized.
ReplyDeleteMaybe you should do a big batch of hard boiled eggs next time? Who wants to eat plastic tasting eggs? bleh.
A big no to hard-boiled eggs because one of SILs hates them very very very much. LOL. I think a quiche or egg bake is easy to do, can be prepared in advanced, and would be delicious!
DeleteEngie, this sounds like SO MUCH FUN. Seriously. My family is not here, obviously, and Jon's family does not do reunions, in fact, there's not much family to begin with and people are weirdly not into getting together that much.... I am kinda sad to have married into a family that does not do fun weekends like that. So I am vicariously living through all the people who have big family reunions at big houses, lake houses, cabins, or other family-owned properties.
ReplyDeleteIt is fun! If you're ever in the Midwest over Labor Day, you can come join us!
DeleteI'm with Elisabeth - worst nightmare. I'd be staying in a hotel/Air BnB and coming periodically to say hi, LOL. This is what my mom's family's Thanksgiving is like, although we are "just" at about 40-ish people. Think of your reunion with slightly fewer people, but inside, with lots of loud people. I'm never there - thank goodness that UW "doesn't have Thanksgiving break". :) But you know what? I LOVE that you love this so much. I love that they are so welcoming and flexible.
ReplyDeleteThere's definitely a family that only comes for a couple of hours in the morning and in the evening. We rarely seem them in the afternoon! And that's fine! We welcome everyone's own comfort level. It can be exhausting to be around that many people.
DeleteThis sounds like a wonderful reunion. Chaotic and yet structured. Loud and fun.
ReplyDeleteAnd of course so much to eat. That what reunions are for, right?
Most celebrations end up being about food, don't they?!
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