Tuesday, April 16, 2024

Rube Goldberg of Chores

Sunday was a glorious day. The sun was shining, the temperatures were well into the 70s, and we threw open the windows and screen doors and that's when it happened. As I was gathering the towels we use to dry the dog that live in the mudroom to do laundry, I noticed that the floors needed to be swept. So I started a load of laundry and headed to the mudroom to clean the floors.

Well, first I need to clean the winter gear out of the mudroom to be able to properly sweep. I put Hannah's winter coat away for the winter and take all of the shoes/boots I wear all winter to my closet. But the shoes in my closet are disorganized, so I start rearranging them. Then I notice that one of my scarves in on the ground of my closet, so I hang that back up. Change out a load of laundry.

Back to the mudroom. 

I sweep. The baseboards are really dusty though. Put a pin in that. 

I start to vacuum the area rugs. Hmmm... Hannah wasn't feeling well the last couple of days and she smells and so does her bed. Move the bed to the laundry room. Put a pin in the dog's stench level.

The area rugs are vacuumed. Then I get out the feather duster and dust the baseboards and door jambs. Change out a load of laundry.

The kitchen cabinets (painted white) are grimy in heavily touched areas. I am only noticing now because the sun is hitting them just right. Now I am using a Magic Eraser to clean the dingy spots, but when I clean the dingy spots, the rest of the cabinet looks dingy, so I have to clean every speck of every  cabinet. I contemplate removing every item from the cabinets and also washing the inside, but I cheat and just do the outsides. While I'm at it, I might as well clean the countertops and the stove top. 

Change out a load of laundry.

At this point, I rope my husband into the madness and request he take a Swiffer to any horizontal surface that might be dusty. I also ask him to clean the fan in the downstairs bathroom. 

I vacuum the downstairs bathroom. The litter box has not been washed all winter and even when it has fresh litter in it, it reeks. 

Ask my husband to help me trim Hannah's nails with the Dremel. I hold her and keep feeding her chicken while he actually uses the Dremel.

Have my husband turn the outside water on and hook up the hose. While he's out there, I ask him to unwinterize the air conditioner. 

Take the litter box outside and wash it thoroughly and then leave it in the sun to disinfect.

While the hose is out and the water is on, I corral the dog and force her to take a bath. I then walk her around for a mile or so in a vain attempt to dry off a dog whose undercoat is the thickest it will be all year. As she shakes, I see water and fur fly off and know that all the vacuuming I did today will be undone as soon as she is released into the house.

Throw the towels from the dog's bath into the laundry, along with her bed and blanket. The dog is now wandering around the house mournfully because she has no bed.

I take the trash and recycling out and realize that the bird feeders are empty, so then I fill the feeders.

At this point, I am exhausted, but the day is not over. 

I head upstairs to do some yoga. Once there, I notice that there are dust bunnies everywhere.

Finish yoga.

Grab the vacuum. Vacuum the stairs. Swiffer everywhere upstairs. Dust bunnies conquered. 

Get the dog's bed out of the dryer. She is so excited to have someplace to lay. Retrieve the litter box from outside. 

Collapse on the couch and write this post.

All I wanted to do was the laundry. 

36 comments:

  1. A busy day and congrats for writing in the present tense and sticking to it. I've tried a few times and haven't found it all that easy to maintain the tense. It's a good exercise, and you got plenty of physical exercise too.

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    1. Ha. I didn't even realize I was doing present tense, but I did do a nice job! LOL.

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  2. LOL LOL LOL-- there's a children's book series called If You Give a Mouse a Cookie that spirals just like this.

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    1. Came to say just this! The rest of this series "If You Give a Pig a Pancake," "If You Give a Dog a Donut," "If You Give a Moose a Muffin," etc., is also fun. Perhaps you could get them in Spanish for funsies?

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    2. I 100% just ordered it from the library in Spanish. LOL. I do what my readers tell me to do.

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    3. HAHA - I thought the exact same thing Sarah. New series idea, Engie: "If you give an Engie a cleaning task..."

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  3. Oh gosh, can I ever relate to this! Rick calls it Rag In The Hand Disease. Once I start wiping up something, I spiral outward from there, and the next thing you know, I'm not only washing walls and moving furniture, I'm boxing up stuff for donation and telling him he has to get his basement workshop area under control or I'm calling 1-800-JUNK in the morning.

    It's especially terrible now, in the spring. The light is not our friend! And baseboards! WHY ARE BASEBOARDS SO AWFUL ALL THE TIME?!

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    1. But the thing is that this is about cleaning, but this is my day EVERY DAY. It happens at work, it happens when I'm working on my blog, it just happens with everything!!

      Baseboards are awful in my house because I have two shedding pets and never clean them! LOL.

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  4. I was just going to say If You Give A Mouse a Cookie! This cracks me up and I have been there, my friend.

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    1. I'm glad it resonates with other people and it's not just me.

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  5. HA. Rube Goldberg of chores is the exact perfect way to describe this! It happens to me too -- but usually without quite so much productivity!

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    1. It was only productive because it was a weekend day. If this had happened on a Tuesday, the baseboards would still be dusty.

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  6. Hahahahaha... I like the other commenter's references to If You Give a Mouse a Cookie. If you haven't read that, look at it quickly next time you're at the library.
    I guess this is why spring cleaning is a thing! It hasn't happened to me yet... I definitely need a day like this.

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    1. I am definitely going to get that book the next time I go to the library!

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  7. yes! Scope creep of chores. There is something, though, that feels so nice to have a good clean on a spring day - a kind of spring fever. I hope you got to enjoy the weather after all your hard work.
    I should try magic eraser on our cabinets - they are just so greasy/grimy from being, well, in the kitchen..

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    1. The magic eraser sort of peels off paint, so I'm not 100% recommending it.

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  8. Yes! This happens to me all the time. And often, I don't even get around to the intended chore. *facepalm*
    Also, this made me laugh: "I hold her and keep feeding her chicken while he actually uses the Dremel." I have done similar things with kids getting their fingernails cut...though it wasn't chicken and I didn't use a Dremel. Close enough?! :)

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    1. No living creature likes their nails cut. It's too stressful. And then someone gets hurt!

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  9. YESSSSSS been there done this SO MANY TIMES. I just want to do laundry OK??? Is that too much to ask???

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    1. YES, IT'S OBVIOUSLY TOO MUCH TO ASK. And it's crazy because I'm the only one who seems to notice the cascading consequences of doing one chore. No one else notices the baseboards or dirty cabinets!

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  10. Ha! Ha! Ha! This is so true! Now my baseboards are looking at me.

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    1. Why are baseboards so cruel?

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  11. This is all of us at one time or another! It just spirals out of control so quickly.

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    1. One clean thing just shows you how filthy everything else is. I guess I could do more to prevent things from "filthy" stage.

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  12. Glad to see I wasn't the only one who was thinking of If You Give a Mouse a Cookie!

    This sounds exhausting!! But kudos for getting it all done.

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    1. I'm hosting book club this weekend, so at least it won't be a total 100% cleaning spring on Saturday.

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  13. We call this 'The Cleaning Bug', and once it starts, no one is safe. If I catch it, Ted and Maya often run away so they don't get drafted, though occasionally it is contagious and they will dive in on their own projects.

    We have horrible cabinets and floorboards. When the floorboards were put in, they weren't painted, just the white color they came in. "Why pay extra?" we thought. Well, the problem is that they get scuffed and don't get clean. I need to paint them. But if they look crisp and lovely, then we will notice that the walls could use a touch up, and goodness, it's time for new carpet, what about the hole in the kitchen flooring that is currently covered with a mat, what about the leak near the toilet in the downstairs bathroom that is causing damage to the flooring, we really need all new flooring, shouldn't we have the popcorn scraped from the upstairs ceilings, I'd love a walk in shower to replace our tub, why don't we have unlimited time/energy/MONEY for all of these things? So I ignore them.

    I did recently clean the kitchen cabinets (which have chipped paint due to aggressive cleaning/magic eraser, and chipping white painted hinges due to our lazy DIY repainting project about 25 years ago) and it made me really happy. I can usually contain my cleaning bug to one room, if that room is the kitchen, because it's never ending. Fridge cleanout, cupboard cleanouts, cupboard doors, floor, windows, it never ends. Best taken on during a workday, so I don't spiral. I don't really like for Ted to take these projects on, because if he doesn't know what something is, he throws it away. Like battery chargers that are specific to one devise, my favorite vacuum attachment for the stairs, etc. (OK, he knew what that one was, but since he never used it, he thought it was taking up too much space. He thinks I'm a hoarder for keeping such things.)

    The really upsetting part of this post, for me, is that it was a glorious day. Much better to take these days on when it's gloomy outside. i hope you have a feeling of accomplishment from it!

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    1. I would never even notice on a gloomy day because it would be too dark in my house and I would be all cozy on the couch!! It has to be done on a sunny day when the windows are open!

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  14. There was a cartoon once that starts with the woman wiping off the window sill over the sink, then cascades like your day! At the end, as she's taking the curtains down to wash them, her son asks what she's doing, and she says, "Wishing I hadn't wiped off the window sill."

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    1. I was so upset about noticing the floors in the first place! I could have just ignored it all!

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  15. But doesn't it feel good to have everything clean (for five minutes) though? *laughing hysterically*

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    1. *joins in hysterical laughter* Why won't it stay clean?

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  16. I agree with Sarah - this is a total Laura Numeroff book type of day. Our boys are huge fans of those books and there is also a really delightful show on Amazon Prime, too. You got so much done!!!!

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    1. I did get some things done. But I fear that this weekend will be more of the same!

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  17. I do this, as well, but nearly always after dinner, when a) I'm ready to shut down for the night and b) there is no way that I can address all the cleaning/clutter/mess issues that are suddenly bugging me. Then again, your post makes me exceptionally grateful to be in a small space. The more I read about different rooms with different (or, well, similar) problems, the more anxious I got! I'm glad you got it done, but man, you must have been completely exhausted.

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    1. I just wanted to do laundry, honestly. It is a drawback of having a large house - there are always chores to be done. Exhaustion is just a state of mind, right?

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