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My husband's relationship with food is not great. If he could just take a pill a few times a day and not have to eat, he absolutely would do so. But, unfortunately for him, that technology is not yet available, so he must eat every day. And I'd say that his relationship with food is basically functional. He doesn't really care what it tastes like, he just doesn't want it to make him sick. That's why we basically eat the same things over and over and over again for every meal.
He also understands that food is important to me, though, and I think the sadness that I sometimes try to hide when we're having our chickpea curry recipe for the fourth time in as many weeks comes across to him. (It's a delicious recipe, but it takes an hour and a half to make and even a delicious curry gets a tiny bit old after a bit.) So he's been working on trying to expand his palate, trying new things. The issue is that because he's nervous about trying new things, it generally doesn't go well.
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| The GF cookies we came home with after Christmas. I made regular chocolate chip cookies, spiced chocolate chip cookies, my SIL made Oreo balls (which are a huge fave for my in-laws, but I do not care for), dipped pretzels, and the peanut butter blossoms. Not a bad haul. |
His sister, also someone who has celiac (although her symptoms are no where near as severe when she gets gluten poisoning, so she actually bakes with wheat flour for her own children whereas wheat flour isn't allowed anywhere near our kitchen), converted my late MIL's peanut butter blossom recipe (the ones above with the Hershey Kiss on them) into a GF version, and I watched as my husband ate one of these cookies for the first time in decades. The look of bliss on his face was priceless. Maybe we'll convert him over to the side of food yet.
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I've posted it before, but I'm going to do so again for any new readers. Generally speaking, for all cookies I make, I sub my own flour mix in for whatever the recipe calls for. My recipe is:
6 cups white rice flour
1 cup tapioca flour
1 cup potato starch
1 cup corn startch
1 tablespoon xanthan gum
I use Bob's Red Mill for all of this. It obviously makes more than I generally need for one batch of cookies, so I store the leftovers in an airtight container.
I also chill all GF cookie dough before baking or the cookies will tend to be flat.
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To see what Bestest Friend has to say about a moment, go see her at Too Legit to Quit.
I'm so sorry Dr. BB has such a challenging relationship with food and can only imagine how exhausting that can become for you. I'm thrilled he was able to try an old recipe that has been adjusted such that it WON'T make him sick.
ReplyDeleteI hope you find some new, delicious recipes in 2023 that you can both enjoy without any negative impacts on Dr. BB's health. Sending hugs and I hope that Christmas sweets haul brings joy for days to come!
It's been delightful to have that container of cookies! I will probably get the peanut butter blossom recipe from my SIL to make for my husband during the year. I don't love them, so it will be nice to have a treat he likes, but that won't tempt me!
DeleteI feel bad for you and your husband. I can see how, having celiac, his main concern with food is that it won't make him sick. I love how the "moment" you chose for this post was him trying the peanut butter blossoms. That is a priceless moment! Your gluten-free cookies look really good and I have to say the peanut butter blossoms especially look just like the gluten ones. Since I also bake with substitutions I'm very interested in this. Gluten is hard to replace, but it can be done.
ReplyDeleteI struggle with other GF bakes except for cookies. Most GF bread just doesn't have the right texture or taste and my cake recipes have NEVER been successful. I don't really like cake much, and neither does my husband, so I probably never will actually find something that works for that. I'd like some bread in our lives, to be honest, but experimenting is expensive when you buy all the ingredients and the result is inedible, so I'm shy about trying new bread recipes. It's more complicated because people who are GF will always say "it tastes just like regular bread," but they are wrong. LOL. I don't know who to trust!
DeleteI am sorry your husband and by extension you has to deal with celiac.
ReplyDeleteThe possibility of getting sick by eating food that others enjoy on a daily basis sounds awful. It makes sense that you would stick to things that you know from experience are ok. I am glad he got to try an old/new cookie and liked it. A former colleague got celiac after a viral infection and it sounded very complicated finding foods that work. Good reminder that you should never take a good meal for granted.
The new research about celiac and how it's probably triggered by viral infections is super interesting. I'm really curious to see if the long COVID stuff also spurs more research into celiac, since they both seem to be long-term side effects of viral conditions. I mean, maybe they'll figure something out to either prevent other people from getting it and/or provide a treatment for folks with the condition.
DeleteOh what a wonderful moment to witness for your husband! I am so glad that there was a way to recreate a special food for him. I love food so much, and my heart goes out to you both for the issues that make eating into a utilitarian life-sustenance thing rather than something enjoyable. A friend of mine has a child with celiac, and she was telling me that flour particles can hang in the air for a ridiculously long time after a person bakes. It made me fearful to ever cook for them again, honestly. When I make things for them, I try to use food items that are brand new, and dishes/silverware that are fresh from the dishwasher. But her poor kiddo is so sensitive and the smallest exposure to gluten can make him miserable. She has to be constantly vigilant, which sounds like a very similar situation for you, and with more foods. Very happy to read this small moment of food bliss that your husband got to enjoy.
ReplyDeleteYes! A small amount of gluten does so much damage for so long. It's unpleasant and that's why he's so weird about eating in unfamiliar places or from unknown kitchens. At least he's an adult, though, and he understands everything that's happening and he sees the cause and effect. I would be so sad if I had a kiddo who couldn't eat anything. I used to work with a woman who had two kids with PKU and that was SO BAD. Ugh. Food. Why's it gotta be so hard?
DeleteYour husband got to eat something for the pure enjoyment of eating! What a nice Christmas present.
ReplyDeleteIt WAS such a lovely moment!
DeleteWe’re getting to the place where no ne wants to bother cooking anymore.
ReplyDeleteIt's really just not an option for us! It's either cook or starve!
DeleteUgh, that is brutal that your husband has such a sensitivity that it takes away the joy of eating. He sounds similar to another friend of mine who has a ridiculously long list of things he can't eat. He still loves food and his wife is great about finding things he can make. But it's extra hard around the holidays.
ReplyDeleteI do not have that level of sensitivity to gluten, so we have gluten in the house for the boys. But I also make my own flour mix - I use the recipe from the America's Test Kitchen GF cookbook and it's very similar, except no corn starch and it has brown rice flour and dried milk. I made a batch yesterday so I could make some zucchini bread.
The dessert situation was pretty sad around our house for the holidays, though. Usually my MIL brings a bunch of (glutenous) cookies to share with Phil and the boys and the extended family we celebrate with on Christmas Eve. But she was too sick to join us. We had some cookies that my mom sent home with us the week before but they were gone by Christmas. I debated trying to make something but lost motivation. I did make some zucchini bread yesterday, though, which is not at all Christmasy and something the boys won't eat but Phil and I will enjoy it this week!
I'm curious about the America's Test Kitchen GF cookbook. I've heard mixed things about it from "it's great" to "it's only great if you haven't been able to have gluten for ten years." Ha. Maybe I'll see if I can get a copy from the library and try a couple of recipes before I invest in it.
DeleteI used to bake for a GF friend (who has since moved, so I am back to aaaaall the gluten), and I made that exact mix after much trial and error. These look delish!!
ReplyDeleteI don't remember where I stumbled upon that mix originally, but it really is effective for cookies!
DeleteWhat a wonderful delight for your husband, and for you to be able to witness that!
ReplyDeleteI can only imagine how difficult it is to living with someone with serious food restrictions! It must make so many things difficult, since you can't really order out when you don't feel like cooking.
Those cookies look delicious!
Gosh, I can't even imagine having that level of dietary restriction. I can't help but think how absolutely annoying and frustrating and exhausting that would be. I have been dealing with some random abdominal bloating this past year, but no other readily identifiable GI symptoms- yet it's been enough to be rather bothersome and noticeable. I can't figure it out- of course my mind goes to words like "malignancy" and "tumor", but it comes and goes, which seems promising that it's not an enormous growth in my pelvic region. LOL. I am feeling more and more like it may be some sort of dietary sensitivity. And this makes me wary, because I really dislike the idea of having to limit any foods! I'm thinking of trying an elimination diet and see if I can figure it out. Then again, I sometimes wonder if it's like, all in my head.... or like stress related- they say the gut/brain link is very real, too. I don't know!!
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ReplyDeleteSo sorry that your husband has such a hard time with food. I mean, I understand that symptoms/pain would take the fun out of any joyful experience.
Food is such a huge thing in our house that I'd be devastated if either of us had such hard restrictions... but I love that you try to accommodate and tweak recipes where you can, so he can enjoy more food!
I can't imagine how hard it is for Dr. BB to force himself to eat. :( I actually have to eat on a schedule most days - I do not typically get hungry, and if left to my own devices would just keep on working until, well, I keel over. Not smart. It's not that I don't enjoy food, but i developed some aversions after some health issues over 10 years ago, and well, here we are. When (not if!) we eventually get together, we can always talk about autoimmune conditions and viral infections. It's fascinating science - and seems to hold up for so many of them! (Hi, yes, I am a complete nerd...)
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