Dear World

Dear World,

I am a 31 year teacher. I teach lots of things, some of them expertly and some not so expertly. I am married to a wonderful man who works really hard and humors my many idiosyncrasies and tendency to hum Bon Jovi songs as I'm going to sleep at night.

Here's what I would write if I were going to write a bio of myself:

NGS holds a bachelor's degree from Bowling Green (Ohio) State University (go Falcons!) where she majored in political science and minored in mathematics. She holds an advanced degree in political science from the University of Minnesota with a focus on American politics and research methods. She spends her spare time reading books on Euclid and Newton and practicing solving quadratic equations. She's also obsessed with maintaining her standing as the all-time scoring champion on the Wii Fit Skateboard Arena game in her home.

In addition, NGS volunteers for an organization that monitors court cases and tries to figure out ways to make the criminal justice system more transparent and fair. She also spends a lot of time trying to convince her husband that they should get a puppy.

Oh, wait. That IS a bio I wrote for myself to include in brochures for one of my jobs. Who's to say I'm not awesome.

Here are some things you might not know about me.

1) The first time I ever carved a pumpkin, I was in college.

2) I am an expert on standardized tests (seriously).

3) In the last month, I have traveled every weekend except this last weekend when I worked both Saturday and Sunday. My husband is beginning to think he's a bachelor again.

4) If you are my friend, I will tell you when I think you're acting like an idiot. If you're not really my friend, I'll bite my tongue but later tell my husband that I think you're acting like an idiot.

5) I try to ride my bicycle at least 50 miles a week. Until it starts snowing.



6) I made a gluten-free pumpkin pie on Saturday. And gluten-free cookies on Friday. Just call me Martha fucking Stewart.

7) I can't make it past the first level of the Wii Super Mario Brothers game. My husband has completed all the levels and just looks at me with pity at my substandard video game playing abilities. In my defense, I don't have nearly the time to practice that he does. I'm too busy maintaining my lead in Skateboard Arena.

8) I played clarinet in marching band in high school. Last year I had my clarinet refurbished and cleaned and I love playing it. But I suck hard core. Two weekends ago, I went to my high school Homecoming game and the band director didn't remember me. I was crushed.

9) I read trashy romance novels all the time. I'm also rereading the Harry Potter series for like the billionth time. (I'm on the fifth book. Harry is still a whiny brat.)

10) I secretly want children.

11) I not so secretly don't want children.

12) I am conflicted about having children.

13) My husband knows my blog exists, but he doesn't read it. I've maintained it since before we even dated, so it's my space, but I wouldn't care if he read it. I don't think.

14) I think I'm a pretty good teacher, but sometimes I wish I had more patience with my students.

15) My favorite animals in the whole wide world are pigs.

That's all. Thanks for listening,