Bestest Friend and I are doing a blog project. Each day we write a blog post on a pre-determined theme chosen by a random noun generator. The theme for the twenty-fifth day of the month is "Relationship."
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I've written before about how men (it's always men) sometimes slow down when they are driving passed me and Hannah to tell me what a good/protective dog she is. Generally speaking, these are men in red American made pickup trucks. Today, though, it was a man in a black sedan. I had Hannah sitting at an intersection in a "wait" because this car was coming through, he rolled down his window, and the following conversation took place:
Him: You have a beautiful dog
Me: Thank you.
Him: What's his name?
Me: Her name is Hannah.
Him: That's a nice name.
Me: (stares at the other side of the intersection longingly)
Hannah: (wags tail)
Him: (slowly continues to turn, taking approximately ten times longer than it should, staring at Hannah the whole time)
Me: Thank you.
Him: What's his name?
Me: Her name is Hannah.
Him: That's a nice name.
Me: (stares at the other side of the intersection longingly)
Hannah: (wags tail)
Him: (slowly continues to turn, taking approximately ten times longer than it should, staring at Hannah the whole time)
What is your relationship with strangers on the street? I honestly thought I had resting bitch face that, combined with a badass looking dog, would have meant I was exempt from conversations with people who don't know me. My husband swears no one has ever stopped him on the street to talk about Hannah, but how can this be? It literally happens to me at least once a month!
How bizarre! It's interesting people do this from their car. It would be completely different if they were walking by and said "pretty dog" or "nice dog" but to take the time to roll down your window and be a creep? Bizarre.
ReplyDeletePeople talk to me often in public because I make eye contact and often smile. If I am not doing that though, I have RBF too. LOL.
I have stopped thinking this is bizarre because it happens so often. I do think it's bizarre that it doesn't happen to my husband who is walking the exact same beautiful dog!
DeleteThis makes me grumpy, because it has to be YOU they are ogling and just using Hannah as an excuse. I mean, not that she isn't a stunning specimen of canine perfection, because she IS. But the whole thing is extremely weird. I think next time it happens you should grip her leash as though she's pulling on it and say, "Careful! She's extremely vicious and hates men in cars."
ReplyDeleteI also have RBF and it has suited me very well. I am so good at tuning out strangers that I often accidentally tune out people I know -- if I'm out walking with Carla, she will often say, "Did you see So and So waving at us?" and I never do. I am Focused On Walking.
I honestly don't think it's me they're ogling. When this happened, I had on my winter coat (it snowed here last weekend, my friends), a winter hat, and winter boots. I look like Barney! I think they are just impressed because Hannah is a good girl and is waiting patiently to be told that she can move off a corner and there aren't a ton of well-trained dogs in our neighborhood. At least that's the story I told myself about the black sedan!
DeleteSigh. How predatory. Obviously, Hannah is an alluring and wonderful dog, but men like Black Sedan are not compelled by her; I agree wholeheartedly with Suzanne, above. Be on the lookout for him again and note his license plate. I wish you hadn't given your dog's real name.
ReplyDeleteThen again, perhaps I'm being too wary.
Still, it wouldn't hurt to introduce Hannah as Satan, Venom, Killshot, or Armageddon.
I can tell that you live in a much bigger city than I do! I don't think this guy was being predatory at all - he was just a small town white guy. I would have better luck driving around to see the car parked in a driveway than our police caring about his plate!
DeleteUgh. This would freak me out - and it happens monthly?! I'm really glad you do have Hannah with you, but I would be very grumpy and unsettled. I like Suzanne's suggestion: "She's extremely vicious and hates men in cars." Ha.
ReplyDeleteI am no longer freaked out. It's a regular occurrence and I just think these guys are impressed that I've clearly trained Hannah on how to handle street corners.
DeleteI will say that there are people who do try to walk up to Hannah to pet her and I've had to say "she's not friendly" because she's selectively reactive to people coming up to talk to us! So I'm definitely willing to offer up Hannah as a mean dog if needed!
I dunno how to call this one. I often get complements on my dog from both men and women and nothing more than a wave when I'm by myself. But being so taken with a dog while you're driving? Nah, something's off with that guy.
ReplyDeleteI don't find this interaction as strange or off-putting as my readers do, I guess. It's not unusual in our town for folks to stop their cars in the middle of streets to talk to people on the sidewalk and in their yards. I guess it's a small town thing?
DeleteThis would frighten me in this day and age. I'm sorry that this happened to you.
ReplyDeleteI'm so surprised by this reaction! I was not frightened. I had my big, scary guard dog with me! :)
DeleteThat is perplexing. Even at rest I seem to have a stern countenance, so people don't necessarily take a shine to me. Mind you, I don't walk dogs either.
ReplyDeleteI think it's definitely different for men and women. I would NEVER ask a man for directions, but I would maybe ask a woman.
DeleteYes- that's weird. I definitely feel that men driving any type of vehicle should not stop and talk to women on the street. There's just something creepy about it. If it were another person walking a dog, then okay. Not okay to have someone stop their car and talk to you- it's borderline harassment.
ReplyDeleteI really am shocked that everyone finds this creepy. I find it annoying because I have to keep Hannah in place and concentrate on whatever else might set her off, but I don't really think it's scary. Interesting. I wonder what this says about me!
DeleteOh, that's just creepy! Even if he/they didn't mean to be, and let's be honest, I'm not sure about that. Sigh.
ReplyDeleteI'm pretty sure he didn't mean to be scary or creepy at all! And, honestly, I wasn't creeped out, just annoyed and very mildly inconvenienced.
DeleteOh gosh, people stop me all the time to talk to me. I have to say it's a lot easier with Rex because people usually say things like "he's so big!" or what have you. But with Barkley, people stopped me in the street to comment on his lump, and it happened at least once a day and it broke my heart every time. That includes people who would slow down the car and roll down the window. So, this is a thing that has happened to me a lot, and it's weird. I have to say that guy sounds kind of creepy. I don't really mind when people say hi to me in the street, to be honest, but I am also a person who has full conversations with complete strangers and everyone at the grocery store knows me by name.
ReplyDeleteYou've written about how sad it made you when people only wanted to talk about Barkley's lump before and I've really internalized it. Now when I see someone walking a dog that's clearly at the end, I ask if the dog has any favorite toys or who his/her favorite human is. I don't ask at all about health or prognoses because I think it *might* make someone sad, however momentary. There's a golden retriever at the dog park who looks to be a million years old and I know he's mostly deaf and blind, but he loves sniffing at the dog park, he loves his woman human the best, and he has a blankie he's slept with for the last several years.
DeleteOkay, that made me tear up. On behalf of every person who has had a visibly ill or old dog, thank you so much. xo
DeleteOh, small talk with strangers is a nonplus for me. Unfortunately, both my guy and my daughter are huge fans of talking to strangers so I often get pulled into these conversations - just so awkward!!
ReplyDeleteHa. Awkward, indeed! Especially when you just want the conversation to end.
DeleteOk, maybe I'm weird, because unlike most other people, I didn't read this as super creepy at all?? I mean, if he had said something like "hey baby, how you doin'?" while winking at you and checking out your butt or something, yes. But from what you relayed here, he simply said, "That's a beautiful dog", asked the name, and said that was nice name. Seems pretty basic, complimentary, and normal conversational. Nothing creepy there.... And maybe I am biased, because I talk to men about their dogs all the time. Just last week I stopped a man walking a husky puppy (omg it was the freaking cutest thing EVER) and asked her name (Luna!) and told him she was absolutely precious. I've stopped another man who walks the sweetest looking golden in the park by our house and have chatted him up about his dog, too. I guess I can't say I have ever rolled down my window to talk to someone, but I think I might, if I was stopped right at a light and the person was close enough! Who knows, maybe that guy just lost his dog and was just admiring Hannah. Or maybe, like me, he wishes he could have a dog, but his wife won't let him get one. I am kinda confused by all the scared sounding comments here? Didn't seem like he was threatening in the slightest.... ? It wasn't like he asked if he could come home with you guys and feed her a bone or something. I do think women tend to be seen as more "approachable", so I could see a guy maybe feeling funny about talking to another random guy, whereas women might come across as just friendlier in general, for whatever reason.. so maybe that's why your husband doesn't get asked about her.
ReplyDeleteI agree, Kae. I don't think it's that weird. Maybe it's cultural? Like this is accepted in Wisconsin and no where else in the world? Ha!
DeleteI do think it's different if a woman approaches a man, though. The dynamics are a bit different in that situation. (My neighbor has a husky/shepherd mix named Luna. She's soooo pretty. And naughty.)
I really do find it odd that this happens to you and not your husband. Does he just give off better RBF? LOL. But as long as you're not creeped out and just annoyed, I guess it's just what it is. My thing is that I always feel weird when someone comments on how cute my pet is. WHAT DO I SAY? I'm always like "thanks" and then I'm like "wait, why am I thanking them? I didn't make any of this happen!" They are just cute genetically. Sometimes I'll say "I agree," haha.
ReplyDeleteI've had people stop me with any of my dogs; I think most people just love dogs! I also tell random people that they have a lovely dog. I choose to think that 99% of the people on this planet are engaging, kind and decent and I think you're running them.
ReplyDeleteI think women sometimes are more approachable on the street? Like, I don't see a guy stop another guy to tell him that he has a beautiful dog... but why actually not? Something to ponder.
ReplyDeleteI'm with you and Kae... this doesn't freak me out nearly as much as it seems to have freaked others out. This kind of interaction happens all the time in small towns, particularly when people may see you walking the wonderful Hannah more than once. I would be alert, of course, but I suspect you already are. :)
ReplyDelete