So, -R- over at And You Know What Else does a Blog Share every once in a while and she organized one for today! So what follows is an anonymous post written by someone else. There's a post floating out there on the Interwebs that is anonymously written by me, as well. Here is the post (again, written by someone else). All posts should be by sometime Thursday morning.
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In My Head
When the opportunity for this blog share came about I had so many things I wanted to write about. I figure I'd pick one and really delve into the topic. I recently moved from a semi-anonymous blog to one that is not anonymous at all and I've found that it requires a lot of self-censorship. I don't necessarily write about unicorns and rainbows all the time, but I do keep in mind that my parents, in-laws, co-workers, etc. might be reading. I would love to somehow tie all of the things that I currently can't or won't write about into a fun, witty and cohesive entry, however my brain is currently awash in cold medicine. For the third time in as many months. Instead I give you all of the things that are current ping-ponging around in my head (in no particular order).
*My husband, no matter what, can not seem to put his cereal bowl in the dishwasher. I do it for him. Every. single. day. Which one of us is wrong? Him for not doing it in the first place, or me for perpetuating the problem? See also - never putting the phone back in its base.
*Why do I always have to be the one to coordinate get togethers for a certain group of friends? I have a distinct feeling that we would have lost touch quite a while ago if it weren't for me.
*I have a new boss. I do not trust him. I also hate the way a certain co-worker, who is mean and nasty to everyone, sucks up to him.
*I eat McDonald's far too often. I have successfully lost all of the baby weight I gained last year , but I've yet to lose the 15 or so McD's pounds. I also drink way too much soda. Unfortunately, I don't see either of these things changing any time soon.
*I think I'm too selfish to be a really good mom. I put up a good front, but a lot of the time I just want more time to myself, more sleep, less whining, less balls to juggle, fewer plates to spin. It's so much harder than I thought it would be. And yet, all I can think of is when we're going to start trying for number two.
*Related to the above, I've said over and over again that I could never be a stay at home mom. Lately I've been wondering if I really meant it.
*How do some people always look so put together? I can never seem to get myself in check. I race around at the last minute and just barely make it out the door. Either my clothes are wrinkled or my hair is wet or I'm without makeup.
*What would my life be like now if I hadn't gotten married? Had a baby?
*While most people hate change, I crave it. I've changed jobs 4 times in the last five years. Just because I was bored and I could. I'd change again now if it were possible.
*We're planning to put our house on the market in late winter/early spring. I am equal parts thrilled and disappointed. Also? Incredibly overwhelmed at the amount of work we have to do to get it ready for sale.
*I love my mom, but she drives me nuts. She's always the victim. I try really hard to keep that out of my personality, unfortunately it creeps in from time to time and I hate myself for it.
*The Office just isn't as funny as it used to be. Michael Scott resembles a former boss and the things he does just make me cringe. I will forever have a soft spot for Jim Halpert though.
*My greatest fear is that my dad will die unexpectedly. I don't worry about anyone nearly as much as I worry about him. However, I am not what you would necessarily call a daddy's girl.
*A sleeping baby greatly reduces my opportunities for singing full out during my commute. I still have dreams of being a famous singer or at the very least getting on stage with a band.
*I am really paranoid that this post won't measure up to those of the other participants.
*My life is very full. I know that I am incredibly fortunate. Yet I'm still anxious and unhappy most of the time. I think I'm finally at a point where I'm ready to ask for help, not just for me, but for the people I care about. They deserve a better version of me.
And that's about it. Now my brain is a bit emptier - and your life is a tad more full, right?
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For more anonymous fun, check out the following blogs, all participating in this Blog Share:
Not the Daddy
O is for Olson
Red Red Whine
Rediscovering Me
Reflections in the Snow-covered Hills
The Reluctant Grownup
Sauntering Soul
Serendipity Now
Snarke
So, This is a Treadmill
Thinking Some More
Time for Change
Together They Come
Wondering and Pondering
And You Know What Else
Andrea Unplugged
Arctic-ulate
Bright Yellow World
Bwildered
Catheroominations
Did I Say That Outloud?
Dispatches from the Failed Mommy Club
Full of Snark
Heidikins
Hot Chicks Dig Smart Men
Just Below 63
The Little Goat
I'm usually the coordinator for a group of our friends, too. I figure, if they really wanted to lose touch, they'd stop agreeing to the get-togethers. :-)
ReplyDeleteRight. :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing!
Don' be so hard on yourself - no one's as together as they think they should be, and every mom believes they're selfish for wanting some time for themselves.
ReplyDeleteThis, too, shall pass. Unlike the McDonald's...
:-)
First, I like this post. I don't think you need to worry about it measuring up to any others!
ReplyDeleteSecond, why can't husbands just PUT THINGS AWAY!!!
I recently migrated from semi-anonymous to public, and I definitely find myself censoring.
ReplyDeleteI related to so many of your points. I think that's the amazing thing about blogging: we suddenly realize that we're not alone.
I have the exact same fear about my dad! Why? He's only 50, for christsake. He's been in the hospital once for heart issues and he doesn't eat very well... I just really worry about that, too.
ReplyDeleteThe cereal bowl made me laugh. We have the same issue, but with socks. Dirty ones. My friend and I are thinking of collecting them all and having a big bonfire this spring.
ReplyDeleteGreat post. I've got responses to two of your items...
ReplyDeleteFirst...Be thankful it's just cereal bowls. We've just been married a few months. My husband bites his fingernails, and on a few occasions now, I've found little piles of fingernails in random places. I've asked nicely a time or two for him to quit doing that, and so far seems to be working. :)
Second...for the friend get togethers. If you enjoy coordinating them and enjoy the company of the friends, keep at it. And maybe establish a rotating schedule of planning (since you're responsibilities with the baby have changed the amount of time you have). If you at all resent it and enjoy their company less and less, then maybe you should take a break at the planning for a bit.