Let's say my name is Margaret for the sake of this discussion. It's not, but Margaret, like my name, has a lot of nicknames associated with it - Maggie, Marge, Meg, Peg, Peggy, and the like.
As a child, I went by Peggy. My family called me Peggy, my teachers and schoolmates called me Peggy, and I was happy enough to go by Peggy and occasionally folks would shorten it to Peg and I'd be all right with that, too.
But when I changed schools in fifth grade, I was too shy to tell anyone that I went by Peggy on that first day of school, so everyone started calling me Margaret. And I liked it. I felt like that name really represented me. So from that point out, I introduced myself as Margaret and I thought of myself as Margaret. Sure, my family still calls me Peggy for the most part and there are a few friends who I've known since elementary school who call me Peggy, but anyone I have met as an adult calls me Margaret.*
Just to stress this, even my husband calls me Margaret 95% of the time.
My sister has recently gotten engaged. I have met the guy once and he seems nice enough. He's not really my kind of people, but he's perfectly pleasant and respectable. And since my sister is one of the folks who calls me Peggy, he calls me Peggy. When I introduced myself at our one meeting, I introduced myself as Margaret. When I sent out an engagement card to him (very proper, I know), I signed it Margaret. I signed the holiday card I sent him Margaret. I did everything I could to steer him away from calling me Peggy, but the holiday card he sent us was addressed to Peggy.
So, my question is: do I have to just suck it up and let him call me Peggy? After all, my sister calls me Peggy and my mom calls me Peggy and he sees them all the time and, let's be honest, I'm probably not going to see this guy more than five or six days out of the year. Or, should I tell him the next time I see him that, "oh, please call me Margaret - I haven't gone by Peggy in years" and kind of joke it off?
The truth is that it feels kind of personal and strangely intimate for someone to use this nickname. Fine, if you've known me since I was born (family) or before I was ten (elementary school) and I still talk to you, you've earned the right to the nickname. But I don't really know this guy and it makes me kind of squirmy that he assumes he has the right to the name. But, I also know that he probably doesn't know that I am uncomfortable with it.
So, internet, tell me what to do. Let it go, make it a joke, tell my sister to tell him, or just keep passively aggressively trying to tell him that I would like him to call me by my full name?
*A bit of a fib. My Bestest Friend calls me a variant of my name absolutely no one else can get away with and my husband has a diminutive of my name that he occasionally uses that absolutely no one else uses, but these are very special cases.